Make Them Stop
Submitted by hecate on Fri, 04/26/2019 - 11:15am
There are already more Democrats trying to be the president than there are benzenes in the waters. So I am throwing some out. We will start with those whose names are just Wrong. Tulsi Gabbard: too much like Gabby Hayes, unsane sidekick in a bazillion B westerns. John Hickenlooper: a man with a name like Hickenlooper is a man who will wear a propeller beanie. Pete Buttigieg: a name that looks like it's pronounced "butt gig" will engender snickers in a thousand classrooms. Beto O'Rourke: like the street name of a three-card-monte hustler in some lesser David Mamet play. Okay. So these people, they are finished. Over. I will hear no more about them.
Comments
From your lips.
Very funny :)
But we have to keep Tulsi.
Marilyn
"Make dirt, not war." eyo
no, it is not over ... redacted ... humor charme got lost /nt
It is not "Beto"
it is Robert Francis...
Appropriation is NOT allowed.
Prof: Nancy! I’m going to Greece!
Nancy: And swim the English Channel?
Prof: No. No. To ancient Greece where burning Sapho stood beside the wine dark sea. Wa de do da! Nancy, I’ve invented a time machine!
Firesign Theater
Stop the War!
Know what's a good name?
Buzz Winthrop.
Sounds like an all around good guy.
a
cross between Buzz Lightyear, the demented space toy, and Winthrop Paroo, the lisping kid from The Music Man.
The Americans, they could do that. They could elect that, to be the president.
Buzz Winthrop
Sounds like a guy who'd pal around with Loy Hickman and Baz Ashworth.
There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier
Windrip.
"I’m a human being, first and foremost, and as such I’m for whoever and whatever benefits humanity as a whole.” —Malcolm X
windrip
is the Music Man kid with both a lisp, and post-nasal drip.
[video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKcAYMb5uk4]
Know what's a good name?
Buzz Winthrop.
Sounds like an all around good guy.
Try holding your breath while drinking a glass of water.
That usually stops my hiccups.
"The object of persecution is persecution. The object of torture is torture. The object of power is power. Now do you begin to understand me?" ~Orwell, "1984"
Resolved: never post from my phone again
Lol
There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier
Everybody knows that Buzz Winthrop
...is a Defense Contractor. Duh.
____________________
The political system is what it is because the People are who they are. — Plato
How about Barack Obama?
No, wait. We already did that.
There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier
he
was a joke from the universe, trying to hint to the humans that the voting, it is just shit made up. As I channeled here about 48 hours before there was a fire:
That particular cosmic joke
...pulled everybody's chain and is turning the earth into a Freedom Fry.
____________________
The political system is what it is because the People are who they are. — Plato
and
after they made a black man the president, the Americans made a Klansman, the president.
Because that's just the way, they roll.
It's where irony goes to die
There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier
That's also why we can't have nice things.
What did we ever do to deserve this?
Wait....... uh... nevermind.
____________________
The political system is what it is because the People are who they are. — Plato
they
made a Poll, there at the GQ, as to what are the most nicest things, among the Americans, and the top eight, of what they came up with, were: George Washington's horse, apple pie, Abe Lincoln’s beard, football, pickup trucks, country music, air conditioning, and drag racing. Also making the list: the word "ya'll," John Deere, NASCAR, fried food, power tools, adult illiteracy, putting clothes on dogs, trans fats, and fire.
i suggest that you made that second list up.
tell me, is this a nice thing: the happy little smile of the woman who is always giddily glad to see you, but never comes to see you? is that the thing they call "bittersweet"?
The earth is a multibillion-year-old sphere.
The Nazis killed millions of Jews.
On 9/11/01 a Boeing 757 (AA77) flew into the Pentagon.
AGCC is happening.
If you cannot accept these facts, I cannot fake an interest in any of your opinions.
you
can click the link! I engaged in no making-upness!
And who is this woman, who is giddily glad to see me? But never does?
This woman. I think. I've seen. Not seen. Somewhere. Nowhere. After. Everywhere. Before.
[video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GmVFLqgLelc]
i apologize profusely for having confused you
with my casual application of the colloquial 2nd person in place of the formal third-person ungendered. i regret to say that the woman in question is giddily glad to see me, not you.
yes.
I very much regret, the saying of that.
The earth is a multibillion-year-old sphere.
The Nazis killed millions of Jews.
On 9/11/01 a Boeing 757 (AA77) flew into the Pentagon.
AGCC is happening.
If you cannot accept these facts, I cannot fake an interest in any of your opinions.
well,
if she's giddily glad to see you, yet does not: I cannot, alas, I don't think, help you. Any more. Than I already. May have.
@UntimelyRippd
I think so, yes.
[video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wyd9OcI37AY]
Nice things?
I thought it was a list of the most "American" things about America. I eventually read the whole list, although I got stuck at No. 1 for quite a while. I totally didn't know George Washington had a special relationship with a horse. I think of him more as an arborist.
Anyway, not many of the one hundred items struck me as particularly American. The list had the sensibilities of the Chapo Trap House over on reddit. In the end, only five items resonated as uniquely American to me:
• Lighting things on fire recreationally (see also: blowing things up recreationally)
• Using a completely incomprehensible system of measurement
• Being gluten free
• Mobility scooters
• Mobility scooters (again)
____________________
The political system is what it is because the People are who they are. — Plato
they
all seemed pretty alien to me. But then, I am not an American.
A thing I found interesting, is that so few of them involved sound. I don't think the Americans, hear much. And almost never, listen.
[video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lN33cMfnp38]
ah. that explains how Adult Illiteracy made the list.
As GWB told us, holding down three jobs in order to make ends meet is uniquely American.
I suppose as well that it is uniquely American for a politician to proudly proclaim the national uniqueness of the necessity of working three jobs.
The earth is a multibillion-year-old sphere.
The Nazis killed millions of Jews.
On 9/11/01 a Boeing 757 (AA77) flew into the Pentagon.
AGCC is happening.
If you cannot accept these facts, I cannot fake an interest in any of your opinions.
one of my all-time favorite Onion story headlines
(though not on the front page) was back in November 2008: "Worst Job in America Given to a Black Man".
The earth is a multibillion-year-old sphere.
The Nazis killed millions of Jews.
On 9/11/01 a Boeing 757 (AA77) flew into the Pentagon.
AGCC is happening.
If you cannot accept these facts, I cannot fake an interest in any of your opinions.
Big joke
But only funny for the masters of the universe.
There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier
Had my three grandson's for a week long visit
last week, ages 6, 3 and 2. What a riot. One thing that came up a few times in trying to keep one or another of them from doing something unsatisfactory was to ignore them and they'd stop. Works pretty good with young kids, if you stop giving the attention on something, they stop.
Exactly. If only Donald Trump had not had attention
lavished on all his idiocies!
"The object of persecution is persecution. The object of torture is torture. The object of power is power. Now do you begin to understand me?" ~Orwell, "1984"
Best laugh I’ve had all week
Thank you!
I especially liked ‘then they brought in a clansman’ LOL.
Ain’t that the truth.
klan,
he am. ; )
Well, you threw me out, with Tulsi.
"I’m a human being, first and foremost, and as such I’m for whoever and whatever benefits humanity as a whole.” —Malcolm X
you
cannot be thrown out. You are flying the plane.
what could more perfectly complete the 20-year journey
of the DNC through the wilds of self-destructive incompetence, than to toss the pilot out of the plane?
The earth is a multibillion-year-old sphere.
The Nazis killed millions of Jews.
On 9/11/01 a Boeing 757 (AA77) flew into the Pentagon.
AGCC is happening.
If you cannot accept these facts, I cannot fake an interest in any of your opinions.