Open Thread - 05-13-22 - A Cautionary Tale

Folks, don't do this.

The neighbor's pet chimpanzee escaped again last night. He sneaks across the yard, through the window, and loves to bang on the keyboard of my computer. I've lost count of how many times he's done this.

Soooo, after sharing some 25% Indica and a few nips of Crown Royal with Gunther last night, yeah his name is Gunther (he's Austrian, OK?), I woke up on the sofa with him sleeping at my feet. Now if that's not weird enough, I sat down at my computer this morning and I found an open thread essay all typed out and ready to go.

Well, here it is Friday morning and I've prepared nothing for today's OT, and since I'm not sure who exactly wrote this essay, Gunther or myself, I will throw caution to the wind and publish it anyway.

I'll let you discern which simian brain concocted this flatulation of imagination.

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More below the fold.
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A Roundtable Discussion - featuring Socrates and assorted guests [already in progress]

[Nostradomus]: "Maybe something will happen." "Maybe when NATO and Russia are about to unleash radioactive hell upon the earth, when there is no more hope for diplomacy and it appears we are all doomed, maybe something will happen." "Maybe."

[Socrates]: "Maybe?" "Like what?"

[Enrico Fermi (Fermi Paradox)]: "Oh, I don't know, visitors from outer space maybe?" "Intervening at the last second to prevent mankind from destroying itself."

[Socrates]: "Why would aliens do that?"

[Captain James Kirk]: "Beats me, to save mankind from annihilation, I guess."

[Socrates]: "Ok, well, that may save mankind from nuclear war, but what about climate change, starvation, pandemics, geological disasters and other stuff I can't think of right now?" "What will save mankind from all of that?"

[Giorgio A. Tsoukalos]: "The knowledge that the aliens will give them."

[Socrates]: "Why would the aliens do all of that?" "What's in it for them?"

[Ming the Merciless]: "Peace of mind, knowing that the universe will be safe from a predatory mankind."

[Socrates]: "Well, that seems like a stretch." "How will mankind react to all of this?"

[Klaus Schwab]: "It will bring all of mankind together into a New World Order/Great Reset."

[Socrates]: "But who will be the boss?"

[WEF]: "Klaus Schwab."

[Socrates]: "I do have to admit he does look like an alien." "But, are you sure about all of this?"

[Schrödinger's Cat]: "Maybe."

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Comments

how the heck did Gunther type with such good syntax?

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13 users have voted.

got together with Sima's baby goat, what a wonderful world it would be!

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9 users have voted.

@on the cusp
s-l400.jpg

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Sima's picture

@on the cusp
I bet they'd get along as well as the goats do with other animals!

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If you're poor now, my friend, then you'll stay poor.
These days, only the rich get given more. -- Martial book 5:81, c. AD 100 or so
Nothing ever changes -- Sima, c. AD 2020 or so

Lookout's picture

Klaus does look like an alien....and he wants to impose a ruling oligarch class upon us happy serfs (as though we don't already have that, but their wet dream is to replace nation states with global corporate states). Spooky how many political leaders are graduates of his leadership class.

Perhaps Mr Putin will at least stall the reset.

How nice to have a neighborhood monkey help with your OT. Pretty smart ape.

Take care and have a good day!

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15 users have voted.

“Until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

@Lookout
likes to escape as well.

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He's a dumb ass though, you can tell by the company he keeps.

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enhydra lutris's picture

@JtC

a hundred dollars today's inflation adjusted prize:

be well and have a good one

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That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

@enhydra lutris
as much as this essay is, that is to say, "not much".

Today is Friday the 13th, the stock market should be interesting.

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6 users have voted.
enhydra lutris's picture

this month Friday the 13 falls on a Friday. There is an oldish pseudo-inspirational saying that "Today is the first day of the rest of your life", so, just my luck that it would be Friday the 13th, because, with any luck, it really is. Luckily --

So, yestidday I had a potentially life changing experience, to be followed by a continuing series of similar ones, assuming that things go well. I am a long time sufferer from chronic ulcerative colitis which has been progressively getting more and more out of control and serious/deleterious. It has actually been flaring since last September and getting worse and worse until they put me on two longish back-to-back prednisone treatments. (Prednisone is wonderful if you take enough for long enough, but only in terms of moderating the symptoms, otherwise it isn't really such a good thing.) Anyway, at about 3 pm yesterday they punched a wee hole in a vein and fired up a 300mg infusion of vedoluzimab, a monoclonal antibody medication, that is designed to suppress one's immune response but to do so exclusively in the gut and seems to be extremely successful in doing that and only that with minimal recorded cases of side effects and bad interactions with other medications (including thc and cbd, fwiw). Zo, with luck, other than periodic infusions, I should be able to begin living a half-ass normal life in most respects (except for the fact that I'm bat-shit crazy, of course.)

So, all that said; Happy Friday the 13th!

be well and have a good one

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12 users have voted.

That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

@enhydra lutris
see my reply to you right above this one.

Good luck and here's hoping you get back to your half-ass normal life, mi hermano.

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Sima's picture

@enhydra lutris
To be admired really. I'm glad that you and your docs have found a way to treat the colitis. Hope it's super successful and you feel tons better!

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4 users have voted.

If you're poor now, my friend, then you'll stay poor.
These days, only the rich get given more. -- Martial book 5:81, c. AD 100 or so
Nothing ever changes -- Sima, c. AD 2020 or so

enhydra lutris's picture

@Sima

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2 users have voted.

That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

Months ago, I approached the bench, announced to the Judge that we were here to seek a date for final hearing. He asked if oppossing counsel was present. I couldn't think of her name, said "She is the lady standing behind me.
Well, this violently woke person started screaming that I was unprofessional, that I would address her as "Attorney Last Name" clenching her fists, blah blah, to which I replied, "Backatcha, chick."
The bailiff stepped in between us.
So as to distract her, and piss her off royally, I rummaged through 4 closets, came up with the outfit to get it done: short white skirt with frilly embroidered hem; pink and yellow floral print top; pale pink jacket; Murano glass beads; an opal ring that is knuckle to knuckle; A WEDDING RING; SNOW WHITE CRACK-WHORE-POLE-DANCING SANDALS, maybe 4 inches high.
Hope everyone has as much fun this afternoon as I will!

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enhydra lutris's picture

@on the cusp

but I surmise that nobody can possibly match the festivities in which you are about to participate for fun and festiveness.

be well and have a good one, good luck and have fun.

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9 users have voted.

That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

@enhydra lutris will laugh his ass off when he sees me. He will be in on my mission.

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Sima's picture

@on the cusp
And great revenge!

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If you're poor now, my friend, then you'll stay poor.
These days, only the rich get given more. -- Martial book 5:81, c. AD 100 or so
Nothing ever changes -- Sima, c. AD 2020 or so

Hi JtC, Happy Friday the 13th. Good luck to all. Gunther rocks. I went seeking a quote by [Sartre] to butt in, whoosh went that rabbit down you know what/where.

So today I learned about the short life of Isidore Lucien Ducasse from the wiki. Comte de Lautréamont. [Schrödinger's Cat], maybe wrote this caption over there:

Possibly a photo representing Lautréamont

Les Chants de Maldoror was too dark, so I bookmarked it for later. Heh.
Needing a laugh, this is what fell out of my lint trap for mental floss:

Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp Opening and Closing Theme 1970 - 1971 (With Snippets)

"Lance Link, What ya gonna think?" Is so much simpler than, "The chance meeting on a dissecting-table of a sewing-machine and an umbrella, by Nurse with Wound", if you ask me. There's always tomorrow.

Peace and Love
far out

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QMS's picture

@eyo

"The chance meeting on a dissecting-table of a sewing-machine and an umbrella, by Nurse with Wound"

that's good stuff, mind if I use it in the developing sacratism of life novel?

Wink

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it's so hot out and all those schwab types need to defuse, go listen to some music, and do a little dance.

Thanks for the OT, have a good one.

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9 users have voted.

pronoun showdown:
"They" didn't show up for court! I got my ruling by default. Also, 8 compliments on the outfit, which I so wished "They" would have witnessed.

Caveat: I am a believer in "You can call me Jay, or you can call me Ray", it is just that there should be a socially accepted way to be told I used an inaccurate pronoun. I cannot tell by looking. I mean no harm, until I am threatened. With a fist.

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in your vast amount of spare time, please define flatulation of the imagination because it is damned important!

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