Springtime For Hillary
(To The Tune of "Springtime For Hitler" By Mel Brooks)
CHORUS: (Needs to be incredibly ethnically diverse, but all wearing Identical Costumes.)
USA was having trouble
What a sad, sad branding
Needed the right leader to restore
Its global standing
Where, oh, where was she?
Where could that strongindependentwomanwhototallymadeonherown be?
We looked around and then we found
The gal for you and me
LEAD CONTRALTO DNC Member:
And now it's...
Springtime for Hillary Cli-iiin-ton...
Oprah is happy and gay!
We're marching to a faster pace
Look out, there's no such THING as race!
Springtime for Hillary Cliii-in-ton
Arkansas's, the right law once more!
Springtime for Hillary Cliiin-in-ton
Watch out, Asia
We're going on tour!
Springtime Hillary Cliiiin-in-ton....
CHORUS:
Look, it's springtime
LEAD CONTRALTO DNC MEMBER:
Winter for Iran and France...
CHORUS AND DNC MEMBERS:
Springtime for Hillary CLIII-IN-TON!!
CHORUS:
Springtime! Springtime!
Springtime! Springtime!
Springtime! Springtime!
Springtime! Springtime!
DNC MEMBER:
Come on, Facebook!
Go into your dance!
VERY NERVOUS MAN:
We do not have another choice, and if it was Trump it wouldn't be noice...
MEL:
I could do this all freaking night, now that's fifty bucks on copyright.
BUBBA:
The President is coming, the President is coming, the President is coming!
DNC #1:
I'm With-HER!
DNC #2:
I'm With-HER!
LEAD CONTRALTO DNC MEMBER:
I'm With-HER!
ALL:
I'm With-Her!
Clinton:
(BIG Smile)
Thank You so much
Hail to me
I'm the one
Who's destined to change our history
Hail myself
Raise your hand
There's no woman
More deservin' in the land!
Everything I do, I do for you!
CHORUS:
Yes, you do!
Clinton:
If you're looking for a war, I can do that TOO!
Hail myself
Raise your wine
CHORUS:
She's So WISE!
Clinton:
Ev'ry Pseudo-Red Celeb tweet online!
CHORUS:
Hooray!
Ev'ry Pseudo-Red Celeb...
Clinton:
Hail myself!
CHORUS:
Ev'ry Pseudo-Red Celeb...
Clinton:
Hail myself!
CHORUS:
Ev'ry Pseudo-Red Celeb...
Clinton:
...Tweet ONLINE!
THE Hillerites:
The President is making them cry!
She's got those Russians on the ropes
You gotta love that wacky strongindependentwomanwhowearetotallynotmakingjokesabout!
The President is making them CRY!
They can't say "no" to her demands
They're freaking out in Redneck lands
She's got the whole world in her hands
The President is making them cry!
Clinton:
I was just a Goldwater Girl...
No one more content
Got a phone call from the Party
Told me I was President
USA was Red
What, oh, what was said?
Deplorable was quite true
And now they're through,
And now the profits broke the roof!!
BUBBA:
Challenge Tap, Challenge Tap,
Clinton digs a challenge tap,
Bring on the Rethugs to hear the news,
the facts is the DNC, cannot lose!
Cos' Ms. H.
CLINTON:
Who is that?
(Beat)
That's me!
BUBBA:
Is wearing her dancing shoes!
TRUMP:
I am The Trump,
You'll soon be Dumped!
BERNIE:
I am Bernie,
I'm Very long winded and boring!
CLINTON:
It ain't no myst'ry
If it's politics or hist'ry
The thing you gotta know is
Ev'rything is show biz
Hail myself
Watch my show
I'm Obama without a tan or a Fro.
Don'cha know
We are crossing borders
The new world order is here
Make a great big smile
Ev'ryone just smile to me
Wonderful me!
And now it's...
CHORUS:
Springtime for Hillary Cliii-in-ton
Third way's the new way today
CLINTON:
Springtime!
Hot Sauce!
CHORUS MEN:
Bombs falling from the skies again
CHORUS:
USA is on the rise again
CLINTON & CHORUS:
Springtime for Hillary Clii-in-ton
Robots are bombing once more
Springtime for Hillary CLIIII-In-TON
CLINTON:
Means that...
CHORUS:
Soon we'll be going...
CLINTON:
We've got to be going...
CHORUS:
You know we'll be going....
CLINTON:
You bet we'll be going...
CLINTON & CHORUS:
You know we'll be going to war!!
Comments
Bravo.
Just bravo. Well done- I am truly not even close to worthy.
Let's find a barn: you stage it, I'll do sound (or lighting, in a pinch)! Or play in the orchestra, for that matter...
I won't have to con a bunch of little old ladies...
right? Because that would be just wrong.
[video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKE__FoHdE0]
I do not pretend I know what I do not know.
Who am I
to say?
One of the high points of my musical career back in the late 70s was doing Cabaret- as the drummer in the all-girl onstage orchestra. In drag, of course. With a bowler, beard, and (fake) stogie.
Couldn't match the bone player, though. He used a plumber's helper cup mute, which he simply stashed in his bra during the noisy bits. Once again- not worthy.
We did get in some good leering during the MC's "Even the orchestra is beautiful!" line in "Wilkommen". Good times. Gotta tellya, though, the heels have _got_ to come off to play kick drum...
I didn't really do my theater until the 90s.
Loved every minute of it, but was pretty naive when I tried to go into the business.
Forgot to tell them I moved when I got the offer of the role...)
My best memories involved Shakespeare productions, but that's probably because It's the only thing that would regularly cast me. Apparently I look vaguely Shakespearean. (And I was up for the role of Carmen Ghia in a local production of the producers. Didn't get it due to being over a thousand miles away and not wanting to commute.
I do not pretend I know what I do not know.
Ermergewrd-
you actually made _money_ in theater? Talk about not being worthy. I really do freakin' *abase* myself...
If I totalled up all the money I'd made in the arts in my career, it might just barely cover the cost of the band-aids and aspirin.
Very little.
Actors live off Ramen and their parents.
I do not pretend I know what I do not know.
Well, there
*is* that. And also
(Blanche DuBois) "the kindness of strangers..." /(Blanche DuBois)
Damned thing wouldn't let me fake the tags, which takes a lot of the fun out of that. Sigh.
Not that much into 20th Century Theater TBH
Streetcar and its ilk are rather dull to me. I don't enjoy sitting through them and I don't enjoy performing them. Shakespeare is my absolute love, but only because nobody will sit through classical pieces like "The Frogs" any more. (One of these days I still want to do a version of The Ecclesiazusae with rabid Social Justic Liberals as the "Heroes". Could be freaking hilarious especially the final scene where the attractive person is simultaneously demanded to be the romantic partner of three different genders and orientations at the same time, and they're sexist if they don't... complete with competing to see who's the most "Oppressed")
I may or may not have a very sick sense of humour.
[video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3EAzf5fDpY]
I do not pretend I know what I do not know.
Hey, our amateur theater group performed Euripides’ “Orestes”
on a big student protest weekend in 1970, post invasion of Cambodia and Kent State shooting and concurrent with a Black Panther trial.
The high point was when our last performance was interrupted by people bursting through the back door of the college chapel venue, running away from tear gas shot at them by the National Guard.
She came to Libya to see / Gaddafi die, then cackled with glee…
NATO she led in a big attack / Libya bled, now slave markets are back
Hey, work in progress, we'll see how it scans at rehearsal
Sorry, couldn't resist putting on my director hat for a second.
My Rule one of Directing: If an actor has an Idea, let em try it. If it doesn't work, don't use it... but still applaud.
I do not pretend I know what I do not know.
Sieg Hillary! Sieg Hillary! Sieg Hillary!
Hillary über Alles. Sung to the tune of the Horst Wessel song, composed to remember an early Nazi stooge/fanatic.
But, in my alligator rasp, I tried singing your masterpiece's best verse:
Hillary macht frei
Full Credit to Mel on that one.
I only changed One line, and the spelling of Heil.
I do not pretend I know what I do not know.
Brilliant!
You've done it again DM. I know where to find a barn!
Man, I miss theater. My friend played Roger DeBris in a community production of The Producers. Fun times. I made $200-300 per run (two weekends) for most shows; I made a grand total of $1200 one year as a working musician. LOL. Alas, nobody wants to pay
anyonemusicians anymore.This shit is bananas.
Would be a fun parody to do...
A piece called "The SuperDelegates" about how they elevate a candidate that can't POSSIBLE win to run for office... complete with over the top ridiculous costumes and themes. It's a guaranteed Flop!
Ah shit...
[video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9UsReZ3r_w4]
I do not pretend I know what I do not know.
Oh, man, you are
invoking The Unwritten Law here, and as a result you are going to _force_ me to reply with Gilbert and Sullivan.
"I am the very model of a modern majorparty criminal...."
Godwins law- Hitler. The Unwritten Law of Musical Theater- G&S. Spraying syllables everywhere with minimal aim and maximal bad intent. I was just reacting to my training, Your Honor...
You didn't miss "I am the Very Model Of a Fucked Up Individual"
did you?
https://caucus99percent.com/content/i-am-very-model-fucked-individual
I do not pretend I know what I do not know.
Oh shit-
I did miss that. I've only been around sporadically. Well done once again!