Welcome to Saturday - and the ebb and flow of life

I’d like to dedicate this Saturday to my Mom, and to celebrate thankfulness in whatever nurturing form it is found. The longer I live, the more I believe that life and death are perfectly balanced with love.

[video:https://youtu.be/L1W1iCKVhIM]

ps. from my most recent conversation with smiley I can happily say that things are progressing well and in a good way, even if there is still much left to process.

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Celebrating appreciation is a great concept.
Wish we could have holidays with humane themes
such as these.

I see it is getting late over there.
Glad to hear smiley is maintaining.
Stay warm.

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Sail Away
by Rabindranath Tagore

Early in the day it was whispered that we should sail in a boat,
only thou and I, and never a soul in the world would know of this our
pilgrimage to no country and to no end.

In that shoreless ocean,
at thy silently listening smile my songs would swell in melodies,
free as waves, free from all bondage of words.
Is the time not come yet?

Are there works still to do?
Lo, the evening has come down upon the shore
and in the fading light the seabirds come flying to their nests.

Who knows when the chains will be off,
and the boat, like the last glimmer of sunset,
vanish into the night?

~and~

“[T]hat old September feeling, left over from school days, of summer passing, vacation nearly done, obligations gathering, books and football in the air ... Another fall, another turned page: there was something of jubilee in that annual autumnal beginning, as if last year's mistakes had been wiped clean by summer.”
― Wallace Stegner, Angle of Repose

~and~

A study in blues...

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Lookout's picture

been trying to catch up on mowing, weedeating, gardening, and so on as we have a bit of dry weather. A cool 65 F this morning. Had a nice stroll through trade day... visited with a few folks...bought lemons, limes, and avocados. Bought some nonethanol gas for the old farm machinery and a quick trip through the grocery store. I must admit to feeling safer with my new mask . Bought a four pack. Kinda pricey at $15 each with shipping, but like I said makes me feel safer.

Hope you all have a great day!

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“Until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

Anja Geitz's picture

A very good morning to you all!

Thankfulness is one of those generous states of mind that has the power to bring us right back to the positive when we see our minds going in the monkey on the brain direction.

Lately, I’ve had so much to be thankful for as I transition into what is essentially an entirely new life for me. I did some work for a new client this week where I had to come up with a tag line for the front page of this website. My client was so pleased with my work, he asked me to write content for the rest of his website! Woo hoo!

C310A77A-6867-4154-83E1-E41E931BFA4A.jpeg

Then I met with another client yesterday for a blogging job I will be doing for her website where we got to know each other and discussed the nature of her business over a little coffee in my garden. It was such a lovely way to do business. Next week I have three zoom meetings scheduled with potential leads to discuss doing some work for them as well.

I’m working 12 hour days these days and collapse into bed exhausted by 10pm, but the satisfaction I feel at the end of my day is lights years away from what I was doing only three short weeks ago. In some respects, it hardly feels like it’s only been three weeks since I was fired from Trader Joe’s. But I am so very thankful I was.

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There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier

enhydra lutris's picture

I wonder if thankfulness should be an act or action, or perhaps instead a state of being.

“Let us be grateful to people who make us happy; they are the charming gardeners who make our souls blossom.” Marcel Proust

be well and have a good one.

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That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

Granma's picture

@enhydra lutris tends to make you a happier person. When you’re feeling blue, think of things you are thankful for and it will perk you up. And for most of us, there are lots of things to be thankful for, especially if you start small, thinking in terms of a safe, comfortable place to sleep, a meal you enjoyed, clean air (when you have it).

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enhydra lutris's picture

@Granma

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That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

vtcc73's picture

@enhydra lutris I've heard for acting on that idea is: When we get wrapped around the axle over life not giving us things that we want or need, we should instead change our thinking around to listing all of the things life hasn't given us that we really don't want or need.

I've found this can be a great technique to work my way out of self pity. As usual the barrier is always me. Wallowing in self pity has a strange attraction sometimes.

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"Ah, but I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now..."

Granma's picture

For dedicating today to your mom? Is it something you can share with us.

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vtcc73's picture

have become as much a part of my life as learning to live in the moment.

The war I had always been fighting with myself ended when I learned how to live in these three. It's easy to see now that by ending the war with myself I could stop fighting life and the world. It's been an incredible journey.

Thanks janis.

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"Ah, but I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now..."

wendy davis's picture

mr. wd is a believer..in his own way. but he'd long ago shared his belief with me that the best prayers are prayers of thanks, rather than intercessory prayers.

i've tried over the succeeding decades to do that at night before i sleep, although some dark nights it's very hard to do in earnest without digging deep for the simplest blessings we have. i also smudge us both and a list of others with sweet grass smoke while chanting some of the navajo beauty way words that promote harmony, if not...physical healing.

thank you for the post, janis b, to both your and your mum.

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mhagle's picture

An essay and comments to treasure.

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Marilyn

"Make dirt, not war." eyo

janis b's picture

It is comforting at a time of need. My mom died peacefully at home with my sister and brother by her side only hours ago. My feelings are so raw that I can't say more now, but would like to in time. Much love to all.

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Granma's picture

@janis b I will hold you in my thoughts. It is very hard to lose a parent, harder still when you are far away. I wish comfort for you in your sorrow.

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janis b's picture

@Granma

Your wishes are much appreciated.

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Anja Geitz's picture

@janis b

I know what it’s like to lose your Mother and not be there when she passes. Although if you have a mystical bent in your beliefs, she may very well visit you in your dreams like mine did.

Peaceful and loving thoughts. I hope you surround yourself with people who love you.

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There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier

janis b's picture

@Anja Geitz

I hope to meet my mom again in my dreams.

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thanatokephaloides's picture

@janis b

Thank you all for your presence.

Most welcome, janis!

It is comforting at a time of need. My mom died peacefully at home with my sister and brother by her side only hours ago. My feelings are so raw that I can't say more now, but would like to in time. Much love to all.

Peace, love, healing, and hope be upon all of you!

I know nothing better:

[video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c29rlvSu1lM]

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"US govt/military = bad. Russian govt/military = bad. Any politician wanting power = bad. Anyone wielding power = bad." --Shahryar

"All power corrupts absolutely!" -- thanatokephaloides

janis b's picture

@thanatokephaloides

Thank you than, very much.

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@janis b
Take some comfort if you can in that she was at home, with loved ones.
I hope you have someone close with you. Pain shared is pain halved.

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janis b's picture

@pindar's revenge

I am comforted by the love that surrounded her.

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Unabashed Liberal's picture

@janis b

condolences to you and your Daughter, and Brother and Sister, and extended family, regarding the loss of your Mom.

Though I never had the privilege of meeting her, I feel in my heart that your Mom was very fortunate to transition from this world with the full knowledge--and all the happiness and peace that it would obviously bring--that she left this world a much better place, as evidenced not only by her own deeds, but by those of the 3 wonderful children that she raised, and gifted to all of us.

Give rose

Mr M and I wish you healing and peace during the emotionally difficult and painful days ahead.

(My apologies for the tardiness of this reply, Janis--I just found out about your loss this afternoon, when I logged in to do some catch-up reading.)

Take good care, and stay safe.

Mollie

"As you mourn the loss of a very special Mother, may you find strength in all of your wonderful memories together. She will never be far from your heart."~~Author Unknown

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Everyone thinks they have the best dog, and none of them are wrong.

janis b's picture

@Unabashed Liberal

for your sympathy. The tears that your words brought were very warm and comforting.

The best to you always.

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to you Janis. I am so sorry to hear about your mother passing. I imagine that the best place for her to be was at home, surrounded by your brother and sister. I am thinking of you in this time of sorrow and wish for you to find a measure of consolation and solace.

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janis b's picture

@randtntx

for your love and well wishes. It is comforting.

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I hope you take comfort that your friends here all wish we could say the magic words and phrases to help you get through.

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"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." ---- William Casey, CIA Director, 1981

janis b's picture

@on the cusp

Your A and B episodes have been thoroughly entertaining, distracting, and otherwise appreciated.

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@janis b even as I type. It is great to know you react to them exactly as I intended!

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"We'll know our disinformation program is complete when everything the American public believes is false." ---- William Casey, CIA Director, 1981

travelerxxx's picture

So sorry to hear of your loss, Janis. Breaks our hearts here, too.

Please do take care.

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janis b's picture

@travelerxxx

in your tears and heart. Thank you traveler.

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janis b's picture

Thoughts and images of my mom have crowded my head and my body. It’s been intense, but all of it good and life-affirming. My mom was a remarkable woman, who was also just my mom. She did both so well. She was beautiful and had flair, and was temperamentally ‘lively’ and loving. She had a special gift for building and solidifying family love and engagement that will live long after her absence. For that I am forever grateful.

I had the good fortune to face time with her for 15 mins. when she was very present. It was such a blessing and pleasure to experience her as so much herself, and in such a comfortable place.

We family, also had heartfelt fun at the expense of our mom, grandmother, aunt, and cousin. I’m sure she would have laughed along, secretly at least.

Now the reality of life without her begins ...

Thank you all for your love and support, it is deeply appreciated.

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janis b's picture

@janis b

[video:https://youtu.be/IQ2SAtkEsqU]

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Lookout's picture

@janis b

sorry I couldn't find a cut, but here's a recitation
[video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkIi68Ijk8I]

A Psalm of Life
By Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

What The Heart Of The Young Man Said To The Psalmist.

Tell me not, in mournful numbers,
Life is but an empty dream!
For the soul is dead that slumbers,
And things are not what they seem.

Life is real! Life is earnest!
And the grave is not its goal;
Dust thou art, to dust returnest,
Was not spoken of the soul.

Not enjoyment, and not sorrow,
Is our destined end or way;
But to act, that each to-morrow
Find us farther than to-day.

Art is long, and Time is fleeting,
And our hearts, though stout and brave,
Still, like muffled drums, are beating
Funeral marches to the grave.

In the world’s broad field of battle,
In the bivouac of Life,
Be not like dumb, driven cattle!
Be a hero in the strife!

Trust no Future, howe’er pleasant!
Let the dead Past bury its dead!
Act,— act in the living Present!
Heart within, and God o’erhead!

Lives of great men all remind us
We can make our lives sublime,
And, departing, leave behind us
Footprints on the sands of time;

Footprints, that perhaps another,
Sailing o’er life’s solemn main,
A forlorn and shipwrecked brother,
Seeing, shall take heart again.

Let us, then, be up and doing,
With a heart for any fate;
Still achieving, still pursuing,
Learn to labor and to wait.

Take what peace you can and know your mom is in you still.

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“Until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

mimi's picture

Janis, as the right words don't come easily to me, I had sent you my first condolences rather heplessly in my post about the miseries in black and white.

I just wanted to tell you now, what is left in my memory about the death of my mother. She also died in the lonely comfort of her home. She survived my father for nine years and had just my sister near by.

I got the message of her death being in MD near Washington DC in College Park, some 4000 miles away from my mother's (and my childhood) home in Germany. Days before that happened, my son came from Seoul Korea to see me in MD (almost 7000 miles away). He had to check in into his home Air Force Base in Malmstrom in Montana first, (some other 2000 miles), before he came back to me and then we both flew over to Germany for my mother's funeral. (I give up adding the mileage.)

Arriving there, the crowd of family members and friends, who attended her funeral, was huge. It was my sister who had to arrange for it. My brother came from Switzerland and took care of the all the follow-up tasks. You know what I mean, there is something that has to be divided up in the heritage. A work that is not one I would like to ever have to deal with.

All I remember was that I constantly thought, I can't say good bye to my mother, you are all so noisy, give me silence, let me see her casket. Give me time. The casket was closed out of wood. I saw the casket in the funeral home's among as sea of flowers. If my sister hadn't taken a photo of my mother in her deathbed, I would have had no chance to have 'seen' her again..

Til today I can't forget my inner feeling of having gotten no chance to see and say good bye to my mother. This regret doesn't go away. The older I get the more I feel deep love and respect for my mother.

Me and my son had another experience with the death and funeral of my son's father and my former husband. There were lots of things I don't want to talk about, but one thing I would like to say. At least his casket had a glass-like cover. So we could see him in the casket.

I was so grateful for being able to see his body in the caskett. He had a smile on his face. I always will remember this smile, it was a good way to have him in my mind for ever, smiling. A good good bye. It was the same smile, my new-born son had on his face directly after I saw him for the first time after his birth.

May the smiles accompany you in the ebb and flow of life. May they rest with you in peace.

BTW, I know now what love has to do with it ... Smile

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It is good you were able to spend some quality time with your mom in Fla. last year.
May those memories buoy your spirit in the days to come.
Peace

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wendy davis's picture

into the llight other side was like this:

White Owl Flies Into and Out of the Field

Coming down out of the freezing sky
with its depths of light,
like an angel, or a Buddha with wings,
it was beautiful, and accurate,
striking the snow and whatever was there
with a force that left the imprint
of the tips of its wings — five feet apart —
and the grabbing thrust of its feet,
and the indentation of what had been running
through the white valleys of the snow —
and then it rose, gracefully,
and flew back to the frozen marshes
to lurk there, like a little lighthouse,
in the blue shadows —

so I thought:
maybe death isn't darkness, after all,
but so much light wrapping itself around us —
as soft as feathers —
that we are instantly weary of looking, and looking,
and shut our eyes, not without amazement,
and let ourselves be carried,
as through the translucence of mica,
to the river that is without the least dapple or shadow,
that is nothing but light — scalding, aortal light —
in which we are washed and washed
out of our bones.

~ Mary Oliver

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