Monday Open Thread: April 1 is the official start of political campaign season

Submitted by enhydra lutris on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 5:00am

April 1 is the 91st day of the Gregorian Calendar year,
Prickle-Prickle, Chaos 4, 3185 YOLD (discordian),
And let us not forget 13.0.6.6.12 by the Mayan Long Count

It is also April Fools Day, a day of pranks and tricks.

WHAN that Aprille with his shoures soote
The droghte of Marche hath perced to the roote,
And bathed every veyne in swich licour,
Of which vertu engendred is the flour;
Whan Zephirus eek with his swete breeth
Inspired hath in every holt and heeth
The tendre croppes, and the yonge sonne
Hath in the Ram his halfe cours y-ronne,
And smale fowles maken melodye,
That slepen al the night with open ye,
(So priketh hem nature in hir corages:
Than longen folk to goon on pilgrimages,
And palmers for to seken straunge strondes,
To ferne halwes, couthe in sondry londes;
And specially, from every shires ende
Of Engelond, to Caunterbury they wende,
The holy blisful martir for to seke,
That hem hath holpen, whan that they were seke.

Or not, as the case may be ...

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Twenty years of schooling and they put you on the day shift, look out kid, ...

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On this day in history:

1169 BCE - Eris tossed the golden apple and got the ball rolling.
1180 BCE - Odysseus tricked and then blinded Polyphemus.
1178 BCE - Odysseus landed at Ithaka, tricked and then slew Penelope's suitors.
1572 – The Watergeuzen captured Brielle. This is the original Dutch Surprise.
1789 – The US House of Representatives had its first quorum and elected its first speaker.
1970 – The first AMC Gremlins were released into North America.

1976 – Apple Inc. was formed by Jobs, Woz and Wayne.
1997 – Comet Hale–Bopp she bop she bop at perihelion.
2004 – Google announced Gmail.

Born this day in:

before time - Raven, Coyote, Loki, and Eris
40 BCE - Gaspar, Balthasar, and Melchior.
1755 – Jean Anthelme Brillat-Savarin, gourmand and gastroomic essayist
1834 – James Fisk, robber baron and con man extraordinaire
1939 – Phil Niekro, knuckleballer

Died this day in:

1580 – Alonso Mudarra, guitarist and composer
1976 – Max Ernst, painter and sculptor

Holidays, Holy Days, Festivals, Feast Days, Days of Recognition, and such:

Fossil Fools Day
Edible Book Day

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Music goes here, iirc, well,

Geoffrey Chaucer

Eris

Odysseus

Waterfuezen

The AMC Gremlin

Coyote, Raven, et. al.

Phil Niekro

Alonzo Mudarra

gmail

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Have yourself a very foolish day. After all, did not the great Ludwig Wittgenstein tell us: "Never stay up on the barren heights of cleverness, but come down into the green valleys of silliness."
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Remember, in spite of everything:
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Image is Cruel Present by Pascal and is public domain

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It's an open thread, so do your thing

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When this posts, I will be on the road to El Capitan State Beach via Fillmore and probably incommunicado.
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Tags:

Open Thread

april fools

Campaign Season

Eris

Vote

Comments

Submitted by QMS on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 7:20am

All Fools Day

Glad Hallmark has a holiday for the ruling class.

Safe travels.

Submitted by enhydra lutris on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 8:38am

good morning, QMS. point well taken, thanks for reading.

@QMS

—

That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

Submitted by enhydra lutris on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 8:40am

have a good one, btw.

@QMS

—

That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

Submitted by Anja Geitz on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 9:21am

Lol.

@QMS

—

There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier

Submitted by Lookout on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 7:38am

Here's an idea...

Drone dog walking

New technology perfect for the busy dog owner will see drones walking people's pets, The Times reports.

The Drone Dog Walker comes fitted with leash control technology as well as a microphone and camera.

The device also comes with audio bolt-ons, one of them being the voice of a loud middle-class man shouting "Fenton! Fenton!"

What to do with all the extra time when the drone is walking your dog?

Free beer prescriptions will soon be available in the UK, the Daily Star reports.

Pints of stout will be available as prescription medication from Friday for people with anaemia, insomnia or tiredness.

Regular repeat prescriptions will need to be signed off by the doctor to prevent “abuse of the system”, an “NHS spokesman” said.

....and with the start of April it won't be long till spaghetti is harvested

[video:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tVo_wkxH9dU]

APRIL FOOLS!

—

“Until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

Submitted by enhydra lutris on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 8:39am

good morning, Lookout, thanks for the Ticino classic.

@Lookout have a good one.

—

That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

Submitted by eyo on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 7:59am

Headlines that should be a joke but are not

Here's my morning contribution:
Biden says he doesn’t believe he’s acted inappropriately

In a statement on Sunday, Biden said it was never his intention to make women feel discomfort and if he did so, "I will listen respectfully."

and keep doing it because that's just who he is. uncle ernie

goodbye joe

keep flushing

Submitted by enhydra lutris on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 8:45am

good morning, eyo, thanks for reading

@eyo and have a great one. Goodbye Joe indeed, else Eris is ascendant and things get yet more perverse.

—

That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

Submitted by eyo on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 9:41am

The world's longest passenger plane is here - the Boeing 777X

@enhydra lutris good morning This is not as fun as camping through the desert, I cannot believe the timing. Or anything else about it. no foolin

(CNN) — The longest passenger jetliner in the world just made its debut.
On March 13, the very first Boeing 777X was presented to company employees, inside the airframer's main wide-body manufacturing facility in Everett, Washington.
Boeing had planned to unveil the jetliner on Wednesday, but delayed the debut following the crash of its aircraft in Ethiopia. The event was simplified to respect the recent loss of Ethiopian Airlines Flight 302, a Boeing 737 MAX 8.

simplified respect

With that enormous length, the plane is designed to seat between 400 and 425 passengers in two classes, and fly routes of 7,600 nautical miles, more than 14,000 kilometers.

the bigliest

The wing's the thing
Boeing has invested over $1 billion in a new factory to build the 777X's advanced, carbon fiber composite wing, located at the airframer's Everett twin-aisle aircraft production plant.
The new wing is stunningly enormous, with over 235 feet of wingspan. With the new wing, the 777X will fly more efficiently and bring fuel savings to airlines. But huge wings come with some challenges.
Airlines want to operate the 777X at airports that currently serve today's 777 jets, which have a smaller wingspan of 213 feet.
To solve that problem, Boeing engineers created a unique wing-fold mechanism, a first for a civilian airliner.

thoughts and prayers

Submitted by WaterLily on Tue, 04/02/2019 - 4:29pm

Unique wing-fold mechanism

@eyo What could possibly go wrong?

Maybe they'll at least include operational instructions in the manual this time.

Submitted by HenryAWallace on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 9:34am

Who cares what he intended?

@eyo

Try this, boys and girls:

Step 1. Throw a bomb capable of doing mucho damage at an occupied building while sincerely praying that it hurts no human.

Step 2. When you're charged with multiple counts of murder or manslaughter, use as your defense that you honestly did not intend to harm anyone.

Step 3. Make sure your will and other affairs are in very good order.

At the very least, Biden felt entitled to invade the personal space of females, young and older, in creepy ways, and at will. without asking permission. He was a serial sexual harasser in a position of great power. Small wonder he did not, as he has finally said, now that he's running for POTUS in the #metoo era understand the issues during the Clarence Thomas hearing.

You know what's even worse? I think he understood the issues just fine. And if he never considered that putting his hands on women might not be welcome, exactly how big is his damn ego and exactly how small is his damn brain?

I'm sick to death of politicians having belated epiphanies when their past bad behavior looks as though their past misdeeds that hurt many people may possibly hurt the perp instead.

Where's Gillibrand, who was so vocal about a handful of accusations against Franken and so insistent that he resign--and rightfully so, IMO, to say Biden should not run?

Fuck grabby, entitled, corporatist Biden for all he's done, including putting a sexual harasser and, IMO, a truly crappy judge, on the SCOTUS. At least Scalia, may he rest in everything he deserves, was patently brilliant. Evil, but brilliant.

Speaking of which, the American Bar Association, which typically approved of every Supreme Court nomination, was not enthused about Thomas, which was very unusual. https://www.nytimes.com/1991/08/28/us/bar-association-splits-on-fitness-... gave the unqualified rating to SCOTUS nominees very, very seldom, had downrated rated Thomas very poorly. That makes two very big reasons for Biden, as then head of the Judiciary Committee, to act, even apart from any political consideration. (I'd love to know the real reason Democrats gave Silent Justice Thomas a pass, despite everything, wouldn't you?. I used to think they were afraid to be accused of racism, but they had put Thurgood Marshall on the bench. Now, I think it may have been more than that.)

To sum up. Whether it's callousness to women, entitlement, sexism, corporatism, corruption, hypocrisy, or whatever, Biden is beneath contempt and certainly beneath the Presidency of the United State. In the private sector, he'd retire quietly and hope people forgot about him. In politics, people are wetting themselves, waiting for him to announce. Meanwhile, religious right Republicans, who can't post enough Handsy Joe videos elected a thrice-divorced guy who bragged about the ability of a celebrity like him to grab pussy and harassed contestants in the beauty contest he owned, overlooking everything because he came out as anti-abortion and anti-gay.

I'll say it again: America jumped the shark.

Submitted by eyo on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 12:01pm

Great comment +10

@HenryAWallace @HenryAWallace @HenryAWallace thanks, that was a good rant better than I could say. ditto

I'll say it again: America jumped the shark.

both skis
heh
edit: can't spell worth beans, and today it bothers me? bumpity bump

#3

Try this, boys and girls:

Step 1. Throw a bomb capable of doing mucho damage at an occupied building while sincerely praying that it hurts no human.

Step 2. When you're charged with multiple counts of murder or manslaughter, use as your defense that you honestly did not intend to harm anyone.

Step 3. Make sure your will and other affairs are in very good order.

At the very least, Biden felt entitled to invade the personal space of females, young and older, in creepy ways, and at will. without asking permission. He was a serial sexual harasser in a position of great power. Small wonder he did not, as he has finally said, now that he's running for POTUS in the #metoo era understand the issues during the Clarence Thomas hearing.

You know what's even worse? I think he understood the issues just fine. And if he never considered that putting his hands on women might not be welcome, exactly how big is his damn ego and exactly how small is his damn brain?

I'm sick to death of politicians having belated epiphanies when their past bad behavior looks as though their past misdeeds that hurt many people may possibly hurt the perp instead.

Where's Gillibrand, who was so vocal about a handful of accusations against Franken and so insistent that he resign--and rightfully so, IMO, to say Biden should not run?

Fuck grabby, entitled, corporatist Biden for all he's done, including putting a sexual harasser and, IMO, a truly crappy judge, on the SCOTUS. At least Scalia, may he rest in everything he deserves, was patently brilliant. Evil, but brilliant.

Speaking of which, the American Bar Association, which typically approved of every Supreme Court nomination, was not enthused about Thomas, which was very unusual. https://www.nytimes.com/1991/08/28/us/bar-association-splits-on-fitness-... gave the unqualified rating to SCOTUS nominees very, very seldom, had downrated rated Thomas very poorly. That makes two very big reasons for Biden, as then head of the Judiciary Committee, to act, even apart from any political consideration. (I'd love to know the real reason Democrats gave Silent Justice Thomas a pass, despite everything, wouldn't you?. I used to think they were afraid to be accused of racism, but they had put Thurgood Marshall on the bench. Now, I think it may have been more than that.)

To sum up. Whether it's callousness to women, entitlement, sexism, corporatism, corruption, hypocrisy, or whatever, Biden is beneath contempt and certainly beneath the Presidency of the United State. In the private sector, he'd retire quietly and hope people forgot about him. In politics, people are wetting themselves, waiting for him to announce. Meanwhile, religious right Republicans, who can't post enough Handsy Joe videos elected a thrice-divorced guy who bragged about the ability of a celebrity like him to grab pussy and harassed contestants in the beauty contest he owned, overlooking everything because he came out as anti-abortion and anti-gay.

I'll say it again: America jumped the shark.

Submitted by HenryAWallace on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 1:57pm

Thanks for the generous response.

@eyo

Just so you know, I would never mention anyone's spelling, grammar or usage without a damn good reason. And if I had a reason, I'd likely send a private message.

Well, not always a good reason. If a poster has been an ass about correcting others, I'd let him or her have it, right on the board for "God and everyone" to see (apologies to the late Molly Ivins).

If I can understand the post, it's close enough.

Submitted by magiamma on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 12:36pm

excellent HAW

@HenryAWallace
tyvm... Furthering Unexamined Collective Knowledge To Help Initiate Strategic Shifts In Hierarchical Institutional Tyranny

heh

#3

Try this, boys and girls:

Step 1. Throw a bomb capable of doing mucho damage at an occupied building while sincerely praying that it hurts no human.

Step 2. When you're charged with multiple counts of murder or manslaughter, use as your defense that you honestly did not intend to harm anyone.

Step 3. Make sure your will and other affairs are in very good order.

At the very least, Biden felt entitled to invade the personal space of females, young and older, in creepy ways, and at will. without asking permission. He was a serial sexual harasser in a position of great power. Small wonder he did not, as he has finally said, now that he's running for POTUS in the #metoo era understand the issues during the Clarence Thomas hearing.

You know what's even worse? I think he understood the issues just fine. And if he never considered that putting his hands on women might not be welcome, exactly how big is his damn ego and exactly how small is his damn brain?

I'm sick to death of politicians having belated epiphanies when their past bad behavior looks as though their past misdeeds that hurt many people may possibly hurt the perp instead.

Where's Gillibrand, who was so vocal about a handful of accusations against Franken and so insistent that he resign--and rightfully so, IMO, to say Biden should not run?

Fuck grabby, entitled, corporatist Biden for all he's done, including putting a sexual harasser and, IMO, a truly crappy judge, on the SCOTUS. At least Scalia, may he rest in everything he deserves, was patently brilliant. Evil, but brilliant.

Speaking of which, the American Bar Association, which typically approved of every Supreme Court nomination, was not enthused about Thomas, which was very unusual. https://www.nytimes.com/1991/08/28/us/bar-association-splits-on-fitness-... gave the unqualified rating to SCOTUS nominees very, very seldom, had downrated rated Thomas very poorly. That makes two very big reasons for Biden, as then head of the Judiciary Committee, to act, even apart from any political consideration. (I'd love to know the real reason Democrats gave Silent Justice Thomas a pass, despite everything, wouldn't you?. I used to think they were afraid to be accused of racism, but they had put Thurgood Marshall on the bench. Now, I think it may have been more than that.)

To sum up. Whether it's callousness to women, entitlement, sexism, corporatism, corruption, hypocrisy, or whatever, Biden is beneath contempt and certainly beneath the Presidency of the United State. In the private sector, he'd retire quietly and hope people forgot about him. In politics, people are wetting themselves, waiting for him to announce. Meanwhile, religious right Republicans, who can't post enough Handsy Joe videos elected a thrice-divorced guy who bragged about the ability of a celebrity like him to grab pussy and harassed contestants in the beauty contest he owned, overlooking everything because he came out as anti-abortion and anti-gay.

I'll say it again: America jumped the shark.

—

Stop Climate Change Silence - Start the Conversation

Hot Air Website, Twitter, Facebook

Submitted by eyo on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 10:37am

Newsom will travel to El Salvador next month

@eyo replying to myself, I forgot every headline is a joke. pajamas

Newsom will travel to El Salvador next month in first international trip as California governor

“You cannot solve the migrant issue by building walls,” Newsom said. “And I fear things will only get much, much worse unless we fundamentally address these issues in a more systemic way. And to the extent that the state of California can exercise its moral authority and can lead in that conversation anew, I think that’s a healthy thing, and I think that’s part of the role and responsibility of a governor.”

ask Her
Newsom blindly and heavily invested in the low wagie Wine & Hospitality industries, look at the wookie!
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chewbacca_defense
who makes your bed
who picks your grapes

I don't think $12 per hour minimum wage is a healthy thing, and no functioning rent control seems pretty shitty too. asshole

omg I cannot compete against subsidized labor. sry sad It is like the Democrats will do anything, except build affordable housing and raise wages. Just like the Republicans. UniParty AnyThing

unbelievable

Submitted by lotlizard on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 12:13pm

California’s “moral authority” …

@eyo
I visited San Francisco several times during the 200x (some folks call it “the Aughts”) decade and then, after a long hiatus, was there again in 2015.

In the ten or so intervening years, some things (e.g. number and situation of homeless people) appear to have gone seriously downhill.

Submitted by HenryAWallace on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 2:00pm

"the aughts"

@lotlizard

Victorians would give a year with a zero in it this way: I got my first bicycle in Nineteen Aught Nine. Or at least they did in the fictional films and TV shows I've seen.

Submitted by eyo on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 8:10am

Monty Python - The Silly Walk Song

monday morning april first ear worm

sing along
fool around
have fun
PEACE

Submitted by enhydra lutris on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 8:36am

Mornin', all, first coffee before we run to the coasr.

[video:https://youtu.be/6iZ49s7eH5g]can't find you tube controls via tablet - hope this works:

—

That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

Submitted by HenryAWallace on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 8:46am

Thanks, el. Hope you are having fun.

Likely, we could all use a very foolish day now and again, in the sense of silly and fun. I'm here for it!

Submitted by UntimelyRippd on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 9:17am

so apparently, Alex Jones admitted in a deposition

for a lawsuit that his delusional crazy talk -- at least WRT sandy hook -- is delusional crazy talk. literally. as in, he claims he was suffering from some kind of psychosis. you don't often hear of someone using an insanity defense in a civil suit:

...almost had like a form of psychosis back in the past where I basically thought everything was staged, even though I’m now learning a lot of times things aren’t staged ... the trauma of the media and the corporations lying so much, then everything begins — you don’t trust anything anymore, kind of like a child whose parents lie to them over and over again, well, pretty soon they don’t know what reality is.

but then last monday (presumably after he gave that deposition) he's saying that the recent suicide of a Sandy Hook parent was faked.

—

The earth is a multibillion-year-old sphere.
The Nazis killed millions of Jews.
On 9/11/01 a Boeing 757 (AA77) flew into the Pentagon.
AGCC is happening.
If you cannot accept these facts, I cannot fake an interest in any of your opinions.

Submitted by Anja Geitz on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 9:25am

It's a reoccurring affliction

@UntimelyRippd

Called being an asshole.

—

There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier

Submitted by detroitmechworks on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 9:26am

Been a loooong week.

Spring break is always tough for me. Having the kids home all the time is rough. Add in significant others, confidence issues with my writing and numerous other things... well, it's been a long one. Glad that things are going to wind down today.

—

I do not pretend I know what I do not know.

Submitted by Granma on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 11:55am

Lots of parents happy today

@detroitmechworks You are in good company. How is your collarbone coming along?

Submitted by Anja Geitz on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 9:28am

The official start of the political campaign season

April Fools Day. How appropriate.

—

There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier

Submitted by enhydra lutris on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 11:15am

goog morning zoebear, thanks ofr reading. It is

@Anja Geitz
the official start of the campaign season precisely because it is April Fools' Day.
Have a great one.

—

That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

Submitted by Anja Geitz on Mon, 04/01/2019 - 11:21am