Alligator praises Bernie, politically. A genius stroke!

Please finish drinking, swallowing, or inhaling fellow swamper et. al., Your beloved medical analyst has analyzed one Bernard Sanders, 78 y.o., married, caucasoid Ashkenzai life-long politician, Vermonter and dependent-independent.

My initial anatomic diagnosis of Mr. Sanders concluded that Mr. Sanders, of Vermont (to be precise):
has the stamina of someone 20 years or even more years YOUNGER than his chronologic age
Has the vocal apparatus of a bull with timbres akin to angry Brooklynese
Has extremely well-crafted cognitive assemblies (we docs call them connectomes
Excellent neuronal myelination, which makes him very good at come-backs
Mean-benign-kindly-curmugeonly personality characteristics
Amazing posture and mobility for an erectly ambulating spine-deficient individuals. Cartilage, if well-built like the cartilage in sharks can offer surprisingly adept temporary supports. To function fully after any use, the cartilage must be placed in a stress free environment.

After exposing my medical biases concerning the anatomy and physiology of one B. Sanders, you may infer bias at any or all of my following ideas and then blast away. Yes, some here in our digital community delight in such activities--perhaps that relieves the boredom ensuing from semi-hemi-demi-isolation of several weeks' duration. Whatever. Sometimes my ideas are worth ignoring.

Analysis of B. Sanders, 78 M, political genius

Reviewing the state of Mr. Sanders campaign, throughout a timeline which really began in 2016. (Advice to non-medical types: statement of any physiologic or pathophysiologic condition follows certain common pathways. Common pathways does not imply identical pathways. This is biology after all).

Now that we have mentioned the necessity to disambiguate ideas, themes, etc. then we may continue on our scientific ways. But if our desire is to act politically, then it behooves the candidate to purposefully be as ambiguous as possible without obvious lies. But this essay is so constructed that we proceed on an unambiguous path of analysis, hopefully eliminating any ideological arguments.

This essay is NOT about Ideas. This is ABOUT politics.

introduction:

Mr. Sanders, from hereinafter being referred to as B., had run a faltering campaign. My analyses of the reason for such lapses in momentum and posture are irrelevant. Not discussed here. But Bernie went into Ioway lookin' like a Champ. His camp and B. himself exuded confidence. Big smiles.

Then a see-saw battle raged until super Tuesday. First the Klowns began departing the stage, falling off as if from a slowly moving bus dragging "Kandidatura" hither and yon. Anybody remember Eric Swallwell who is famous for being "BOLD without the Bold"? Anybody remember that Clown? Fuck-it-all, he's still a Californicate Representative of the Ruling Class. (I am sure some government types might acronymize that. Here. I'll try. CROTRC. Not very catchy I'm afraid. Please, help out and see if any can snazz up this anemic acronym).

Super Tuesday brought an avalanche off the Klown Bus. To her credit, Whoizliz didn't budge. She held onto the stolid vertical poles between the apposing exit doors. Whoizliz in fact seems to have melted. Please excuse the digression: Lizzie played the dumbest political game in recent presidential history. Liawatha conceivably (nightmarishly) might have won the nomination if she had possessed 3 necessities:
1. Courage
2. Integrity
3. Intelligence

I could, but I won't write a hole essay, er whole essay about Pocohantos--but that's a waste. She's a waste. Her career is over: Berniecrats rightfully despise her. Hillbots will do this to their enablers: find the nearest bus to throw their helpers under. Et tu, B.? Remember, B.: "Nobody likes him".

Back to B.'s campaign.

Super Tuesday, just singing the DNC Blues here. Kinda catchy. That song was really popular back '16. Yep, B. understandably fell victim to the negative winds blowing his way (Neera, Robbie, where are you?). Although he never has given up, affirming that there is a younger person inside that septuagenarian's upright, daily lean body, his momentum slowed almost to non motion . But, plucked up by Nina Turner and the wonderful Doctor (of philosophy), he charges forward once again.

Brilliant Change of Strategy

Maybe B. suddenly wants to win this. Maybe he's thinking:

"Fuck them. Fuck them all. I will take those sniveling connivers down without firing a shot. Those DNC morons haven't had an original thought since Bubba's third way. FDR, my ass. Republicrat con job, those mofos. I'll get them!

(...think...think...think some more)

The nomination goes to Mr. JoJo ByeDone former Vice-Premier of Ukrania (fVPU), boot lackey to the mighty Obiden-bama. Denying vehemently that the esteemed former VP of Ukrainia has any bats in his belfry [see foot note 1], the DNC continues to build support (that's easy) and enthusiasm (not so easy) for their soon to be annointed figure-head candidate.

FOOT NOTE 1: Due to the current plandemic pandemic, we have DNA-sequenced those bats retrieved from JoJo's belfry. Our independent, non-governmental labs have predetermined that none of the bats have SARS-CoV-2 RNA. Thus Mr. ByeDone does not have--wait for it--COVID-19. But, in the interest of full disclosure, Mr ByeDone has the first documented chronic SARS-CoV-1 encephalitis. To explain this to our non-medical readers, this affliction is eating tiny holes, lots of 'em. Some are so small you might call them "teeny tiny" with absolutely as much precision as the news from MSM. End of foot note.

Text resumes here:

From bitter experience, Bernie is aware of the physical might of his opponent. Jiu-Jitsu. Use the enormous but mindless strength of the hulking, menacing, DNC monster (sounds somewhat like alligators intellectually).

The mighty, ever-so-mighty DNC monster has been pulling mr. fVPU toward the nomination, whenever it is to be shown on TV. One cannot push a wet noodle but one can drag it gently.

The DNC messages craft a new persona (with the aid of James L Enfantis of Ping Pong Pizza, Washington, D.C.)

Star Power! Trumpian in stature! Strong! Unafraid to to take strong stances! He'll fight!

Nice try Dems, but you've brilliantly promoted Trump! Genius, sheer genius.

Soon, teleprompter don't seem to register on JoJo's retinae. Hence resorted to the printed word, writ large, on white paper in large black type, Mr. fVPU still falters. Somewhere, faint cries of "Andrew" are heard. But DNC will persist in their single-minded unwavering direct course to disaster. B. sees that train acomin' and decides that he is going to take a different approach.

Here is the brilliance. Compare and contrast the current state of politicking in this Pandemic Time.
Observe the stalwart, unwavering support for JoJo. Forget his declining mentation for now. What ideas does he mouth (although he probably cannot fashion a decent sentence independently within his own brain, let alone make the sounds with his vocal apparatus), he no longer comprehends. Everybody sees this except for those in the Royal Court of Us, not the Ants. (RCOUNTSA).

B. sees it. The loyal Band of Berniecrats see it. Drumpf sees it, smiling more broadly with every Bidenism. But does the Murky Swamp Miasma (MSM) see it? They probably do but won't say so. They hope the mass of Amurikans will overlook the fact that kindly, no Malarkey Joe can't craft a sentence--even with notes.

So, B. wisely chooses to be the Left's Voice of the Pandemic. El Trumpo is masterfully being the Right's Voice of the Pandemic. Although El Trumpo is doing horrible things to Venezuala and Iran all the time, people look to El Trumpo for salvation. Salve Populus Amerricensis, Deus. No greater ratings hath he, Commander Cheeto, enjoyed since pushing Obamanations out of the White House in 2017.

El Trumpo right or wrong is appearing strong, calm, decisive. He pushes recalcitrants like False-faced Fauci and Babushka Birx to do what he says. They push back in public briefly. But the establishment experts, Fauci and Birx, have seen the light. This means that they realize that Commander Cheeto is the most powerful person on Earth. What those two corpromedics realize clearly is that they, their careers, their fortune, their families can be obliterated should they dare enrage Commander Cheeto. This is why the slow walking of "official medical acceptance" of 80 year old CQ, it's younger scion HCQ, now in its 20's, plus the beloved Z-pack in treatment of the Dreaded CHINESE plague.

Getting right down to it: Trump is promoting his ideas, whether correct or incorrect. He is promoting things which people can affirm if they wish--but he is visibly doing things. His COVID-19 actions, considered absent the political pork attached to its funding, are debatable but medically reasonable ideas. Ideas. Position. Clarity. Leadership. This is Trump's image during the pandemic.

Bernie brilliantly returns political debate away from Orange Man Bad to IDEAS. Positions about what measures will help the American people. No other Lefty is doing that anymore. From consideration do never include Pelosi-Schumer et. al. bullshit. Those fucktards politicos are in it for themselves and their buddies. Refer to RCOUNTSA above.

B. on the other hand espouses many ideas, unlike the Camel, Amiable Amy, Pocohantos, and ByeDone who have no ideas capable of helping the Ant People, meaning us. Thus, they sayeth naught.

So Bernie is on the public stage, pleading his case for improved health systems, less financial strangulation of the poorer, M4A. Right or wrong, and I eschew issues themselves in this essay explicitly, he is making a case for action. Now, B. is fired up, as before. Now B. sees HIS PATH to election but more importantly B. sees this as a golden opportunity to showcase his platform assembled over decades. The background noise of sports and celebrity and TV and dishwashing are abated. What we hear, loudly and clearly is CORONAVIRUS. Will the public heed anything more important than their own life or death?

We have political coronavirus encephalitis. Monomania. One thought and one need to enable further survival of self. Solve this Pandemic, dear B. or Drumpf. Whomever has the most rational plan wins. If Trump makes a serious mis-step with the loud background of B.'s stentorian demands for stronger or differing actions, B. will surge ahead.

Here is Dr. Alligator's emendation of Bubba's famous quote.

Bubba's profound advice, and the smartest thing he ever said: "It's the economy stupid"!

But Dr. Alligator gets things down to the most basic:

"It's your life, stupid!"

Amurrikans, patriots, citizens, choose which version of life you prefer: Bernie or Donald. Then vote accordingly.

For those pitiful morons and degenerates who could consider voting for ByeDone, I suggest you not breed with those thinking otherwise. For certainly, those who abide by Biden are doomed to be victims of Social Darwinism on an extinction-like scale.

Summation:

Bernie is re-energized
Bernie found his Mojo
Bernie is pushing ideas, not reacting to DNC nonsense
Bernie is the only Lefty with a large following, quite large indeed, speaking the gospel of M4A and self-preservation.

Conclusion:

No Lefty can outflank Bernie.
No Lefty will be believed as much as Bernie
No Lefty has the guts to sell real, unadulterated M4A

IF B. stays this course of brilliance, he may push Biden aside, if he is allowed to live, and face off against Trump. May the better man win!

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Comments

Alligator Ed's picture

Joe Rogan says he'd vote for Trump over Biden, Democrats are insane to think Biden can win. (23:30)

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Alligator Ed's picture

Sing this LOUD

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During a campaign.
During a pandemic.
Trump has now imposed M4A uninsured get Medicare for COVD treatment.

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thanatokephaloides's picture

@on the cusp

Bernie has pulled back his push for M4A.

During a campaign.
During a pandemic.

I've not heard of this before!
Linkage, linkage, por favor?

Bad

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"I say enough! If Israel wants to be the only superpower in the Middle East then they can put their own asses on the line and do it themselves. I want to continue to eat."
-- snoopydawg

@thanatokephaloides and Bernie was quoted either in a speech or tweet, saying "I am not suggesting I will be pushing for M4A at this time."

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TheOtherMaven's picture

@on the cusp

Possibly the horse's other end.

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There is no justice. There can be no peace.

@TheOtherMaven Bernie sure authored it.

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thanatokephaloides's picture

@on the cusp

Thank you, otc, for the information! (Even if it's bad news, as here.)

Jimmy Dore is on live right now and Bernie was quoted either in a speech or tweet, saying "I am not suggesting I will be pushing for M4A at this time."

Bernie, you fucking bonehead!

If there was ever a time to push for M4A, it's now!

"Bother!" said Pooh, as he pushed "The Button" and started Armageddon......

Bad

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"I say enough! If Israel wants to be the only superpower in the Middle East then they can put their own asses on the line and do it themselves. I want to continue to eat."
-- snoopydawg

Alligator Ed's picture

@thanatokephaloides Blowing the opportunity of OUR lifetimes, whadda boob! And I thought he was a political genius! Please, Berniecrats. I have come to praise Mr. Sanders, of the 40 Acre Wood. Please tell this fellow that he is missing an opportunity which will never again arise in our lifetimes. Bernie, I thought you was smart--you're just another fucking dumb Alligator. Get back in the Swamp!

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mimi's picture

@on the cusp
I am very late to ask that, but I can't understand what has been said here.

JImmy Dore has a fever?

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@TheOtherMaven The document Bernie wrote was an email, not speech. My quote was not exact.
What Bernie actually wrote was worse than I could remember as I typed somewhat later.
The document is on the screen at the 16 minute mark.
Jimmy did NOT pull this out of his ass.
Bernie did.

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@on the cusp @on the cusp
WATCH: Bernie Sanders Hosts Livestream Detailing Priorities for Worker-Focused Coronavirus Relief Bill

"Sanders has called on Congress to pass a new package including Medicare for All, salary guarantees for Americans put out of work by the pandemic, and direct monthly payments."

"The next relief package, he said, should include Medicare for All, provisions to ensure all Americans continue receiving their paychecks during the crisis—as two million airline workers will through the previous package and as countries including the U.K., Denmark, and Norway have guaranteed—and monthly direct payments of $2,000 to every American until the U.S. economic is up and running again."

https://www.commondreams.org/news/2020/04/04/watch-bernie-sanders-hosts-...

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@aliasalias not "would", and Bernie has absolutely no leverage to get it in a bill.

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@on the cusp get tens of thousands of viewers, his last one had over 40,000 viewers.
It wasn't easy for him to get that good unemployment insurance amendment in that 'Stimulus Bill', he threatened a 'hold' on the Bill according to a lot of reports. Yes Bernie voted for that Bill, how could he fight for an important amendment to a Bill and then vote against it? There would go any leverage anyone held in future negotiations.

I realize that Medicare-for-All threatens a lot of powerful financial interests that are the donor/owners of the Democratic Party,and Party members will talk one way but in the end will faithfully represent those financial interests, but M4A passed on every State where it was on the ballot, including States like Alabama and Mississippi, so that is a lot of potential leverage.

It would really help if more members of Congress would back Bernie in his efforts but the donor/owners' concerns are well known to their subjects. They will fight to stop it and if it looked likely to advance they would water it down as much as possible and or add a 'poison pill amendment to it. They are loyal to their donor/owners.

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Bisbonian's picture

Pronounced "crotch-rot".

"One cannot push a wet noodle but one can drag it gently." (Second Law of Engineering)

Some light reading?: https://www.sermo.com/press-releases/largest-statistically-significant-s...

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"I’m a human being, first and foremost, and as such I’m for whoever and whatever benefits humanity as a whole.” —Malcolm X

Pricknick's picture

@Bisbonian
Ever tried pushing one?

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Regardless of the path in life I chose, I realize it's always forward, never straight.

Alligator Ed's picture

@Pricknick how one pushes a Wet Noodle, in particular one JoJo Byedone. Inquiring minds wish to know.

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TaZsa's picture

@Bisbonian haha, my favorite line too, "one cannot push a wet noodle but one can drag it gently"! Joe is a giant wet noodle. @alligator ed Thanks for the laughs this morning and the tiny hope still burning.
Thanks for the link to the not light reading.

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mimi's picture

I can't follow the timeline.

Yesterday night I listened to Trumps Press briefing (must have been yesterday morning your time) and for me it sounded enough alarming that I would suggest to drop all snarky remarks and just put all our strength and thoughts together to come to the help of the United States to survive the corona virus crisis in the NY area specifically.

No space anymore for joking around. It is too serious.

May you be not harmed and infected by the virus. JtC specifically I am concerned about due to the area he lives in, afaik. Let's all hold together and help each other.

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mimi's picture

@mimi

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Alligator Ed's picture

@mimi Terrfiic speech.
Clear.
Plan enunciated
Time now to support society, not reconstruct it. I agree: this is NOT the time for full steam ahead on M4A. Bernie is not advocating abandonment of M4A. He wisely understands that is easier to repair an existing structure than to build an equivalent or better new one.

This speech was political perfection! Consider if you will who is writing this laudation. Just enough Orange Man Bad in their to satisfy the less vociferous DNC adherents. The die-hard DNCers will screw over Bernie just like screw over everyone who has dutifully played their part. So Bernie, good on you. Keep this up and you just might come out on top!

For the benefit of you doubters, let me repeat, in more prominent typeface what was just stated:

Keep this up and you just might come out on top!

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wendy davis's picture

electoral politics save for sussing out truth from belief, i'd considered using this in a coming post. it's from the military times, march 3, asking about the possibility of coronovirus bringing martial law soon, what it means, and what various officials have said:

“I would call out the military now,” former Vice President Joe Biden said at the Democratic primary debate on Sunday night. “They have the ability to provide this surge that hospitals need. They have the capacity to build 500 hospital beds and tents that are completely safe and secure.”

However, one major disadvantage to mobilizing the Guard or the Reserves is that those personnel would be redistributed away from civilian hospitals and duties.

“What we are trying to be very careful about is not overpromising,” Joint Staff Surgeon General Brig. Gen. Paul Friedrichs said in a Monday Pentagon briefing. “We want to be factual about what we have. Our fixed facilities are designed to the force that we have. They are not thousand-bed medical centers all over the United States. They are, for the most part, small community hospitals.”

"New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo wrote an op-ed in the New York Times pleading with Trump to increase testing and mobilize the military to help open more hospital beds before the situation spirals out of control.

“At this point, our best hope is to utilize the Army Corps of Engineers to leverage its expertise, equipment and people power to retrofit and equip existing facilities — like military bases or college dormitories — to serve as temporary medical centers,” he wrote. “Then we can designate existing hospital beds for the acutely ill.”

but trump had notified the national guard to alert 1 million of them to stand by for deployment. or son's (goddam) in the guard, and figures martial law will be next, and if so, he'll come back 'home' (and he uses the term advisedly, as he's not lived here for almost two decades). and article states that 20000 are now 'helping out' in various cities and states. i hate this fucking country.

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Once those are finished, they become private. No link is possible.
His email notification said: "Breaking News: Bernie drops his push for Medicare for All! wtf!"
I mentioned the show before it started right here on the site, hoping anybody might catch it and get that memo. Apparently, nobody did.
The show started with an hour and a half of various topics, mostly about how it is time to take the gloves off, let so-called progressives know that they must either start working on behalf of the working class and poor, or get called out. He ran numerous clips showing other commentators doing that same thing.
At the half way mark, during the break, I went into the kitchen, came back just in time to see the content of Bernie's speech. It couldn't have been a tweet, as long as it was, now that I think about it. It was up on Dore's screen, with that language I tried to quote from memory, highlighted in blue. I was in the kitchen when Dore said where this language was sourced. It must be in some speech. If it had been from some tv interview, Dore would have shown the clip.
I read it with my own eyes, and my reading comprehension is pretty good.
Before the show ended, I received a phone call, didn't see the last 45 minutes or so. By then, he had changed to other topics.
Sorry you and others missed it.
Sorry it cannot be linked.
Once seen, that can't be unseen. I am sure it will be a hot topic on Twitter today.
But I want to reiterate: that did not come from Dore. Dore was showing and reading word for word what Bernie wrote.
Messengers do not get shot for bringing good news.

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mimi's picture

@on the cusp
because I hadn't seen and read anything for the last one and a half days and with the time gap between Germany and the US, I got lost. When I came in late I had a hard time to understand Alligator Eds and couldn't figure out what was snarky and what not. I had worked too much during the day. That explains my 'not understanding' a lot.

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mimi's picture

@mimi
and understand all of it. Just saying. I am slow. But then I still arrive at the goal Wink
And I like what he is saying about Bernie too. End of story.

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@on the cusp About the same time notice for this Jimmy Dore show came across my email list, came another notification of Bernie Live (Fireside chat). I listened to Bernie, not Jimmy. In this fireside chat, he reiterated the need for Medicare for All, and talked about how to help people during this crisis, what legislation needs to be passed (including Medicare for All) and so on. I dunno, horse's mouth or comedian's? Which to pick?

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@Sima Bernie said one thing one day, then another thing the next day?
Oh...politicians do that.
I have no way of backing this particular "sentence" up as a verbatim quote from SANDERS and NOT DORE.
If you really think Dore grabbed it out of his ass, please send him a tweet, he will be happy to respond.
Stef will, as well.
That goes for everybody reading this.
Please take it up with them, as I have nothing more to offer you in the way of evidence and certainty.
Ok?
Thanks.

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@on the cusp I agree, politicians change. Comedians too! Smile

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@Sima is there.
Jimmy got more angry as years passed, Bernie got more compliant.
I prefer righteous anger to righteous compliance.
But that is just me.

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Alligator Ed's picture

@on the cusp Go along to get along is not a mechanism to ensure social change. Bernie is a weak-kneed, etc.

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I do not know how to resize it.
Sorry.
*edit: Turns out it was a mass email, and my quote is close, but not exact. To read Bernie's own words, start at the 16 minute mark.

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enhydra lutris's picture

of the paragraph NOT quoted/highlighted. Not proposing that we pass M4A in this moment. That fight continues into the future. But (at or in this - blocked by Jimmy's shoulder) moment we must act boldly to make sure (hat?) everybody can get the health care they need (or words to that effect).

Not the best PR move, BUT, no way in hell he could get M4A, even if already perfectly drafted and copies made, passed at this point in time, we all know that, but he maybe could team with others to push through a temporary plan to guarantee that everybody gets necessary care for the duration, which is a hell of a lot more than they have now. This is an attempt at getting some umanitarian action up and running for the duration which is still unlikely to happen and likely to be both a real bear and major victory to get.

Just my 2 cents worth.

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That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

Alligator Ed's picture

@enhydra lutris This is not the time to push but the issue must remain visible, even if not currently being promoted strongly.

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here's how I approach a trial. I start with my client's ultimate goal.
I then ask for the moon and stars. I plead for it, I bring witnesses for it, make it public, and if I get ANYTHING more that what my client has at the moment the trial begins, I accept it.
But I will not take a case where, say, instead of a Dad wanting custody of his kids, but hiring me to just get him an extra week of visitation, I will not file that suit, will not take that case.
I ask that Dad what kind of example does he want to set for his children? Does he want them to remember his knee bend, his lowered, cowered head? If so, go find another attorney.
If I can go all out for all there is on the damn books, despite obvious odds, Bernie, or any politician, can as well.
Dammit, nothing ventured, nothing damn gained.
I would rather look good losing than to retreat.
It's the try. We must try.

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Alligator Ed's picture

@on the cusp Bernie saying that in his opinion Biden could defeat Trump was abject surrender of any leadership or integrity he may once have had. Talk about the dad wanting more visitation, WTF? Don't you think that it might be something he really deserves? Maybe this guy is a good dad despite being a not so good, but not abusive spouse. Are you interested only in a share of the proceeds, monetarily? Fine, you have a business to run.

How good can one look crawling and ass-licking? Tell me about the inspiration provided by the Craven Warrior. Please.

Oh, look. He's so fastidious when he crawls. He keeps his pant legs clean so that only the shoe tips scrape the ground. Politics is not about looking good. Politics is about WINNING. Bernie is all about LOSING.

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