International Politics Finals - Liberalism Vs. Capitalism
Linda: Good Morning, we're looking at Great Game, with this the Politics final between the Liberals and the Capitalists.
Tom: It wasn't even sure if this match would come off today, as there seems to be a huge amount of fans of the Fascist and Socialist teams boycotting the match.
Linda: Yes it was a shame that the actions of those fans caused the teams themselves to be be barred completely from the competition. Although what a win for the Capitalists, eh Tom?
Tom: That's Right, Linda. With the Fascists officially banned from competition, many of their best players got the opportunity to really shake up the league. The Capitalists in particular have benefited greatly from the addition of Propaganda and their returning free agent Corporation.
Linda: Which is sure to hurt Liberalism badly in the coming match-up, especially considering that they recently have been seen in collaboration with members of the Communist team. Of course, the Liberals also claim to have proof that the Capitalists have been in collaboration with the Communist team, but as all members of the Communist team have been officially banned from competition, it's hard to see why this is a problem.
Tom: But here we go, and out come the Capitalists! (Theme Music Plays)
Linda: The Capitalists look to be coming out strong with their classic 4-2-3-1 aggression. Looks like Corporation will be taking center, as they've had good luck in the past with his deniability.
Tom: AAAAAND here's the Liberals! (Theme Music Plays)
Linda: And it looks like the Liberals are going to be coming out in their usual 4-5-1 formation. Looks like Special Interests and Identity Politics will be upfront, with the Platform and Economy strictly on defense.
Tom: A bit surprising to see Not Capitalist up front. He had his debut during the last season and underperformed horribly.
Linda: Well, Not Capitalist's fans are one of the largest ticket sales so, it's not surprising that he would be given another chance to play. Remember, this sport is as much more about giving opportunities than it is about perfection.
Tom: Right you are Linda.
Linda: And there's the start... and the Capitalists have called for a time out.
Tom: But they're still playing.
Linda: Well, according to a rule change that was recently funded by a completely non-partisan group which was set up by the Capitalist and Liberal teams, all teams can continue to play while a Time Out is in effect.
Tom: The Liberals are just sitting there though...
Linda: Well, it's very rude to play during a time out. What's important here is that people remember how Not Capitalist was on the Liberals team.
Tom: Ok, so now that brings the score to 20 to One. Oh, Wait, is that Liberal Hero coming to the rescue here...
Linda: Yes, apparently the Refs have called Time In, and Liberal Hero is faking left with the ball... he moves right. Over to Economic Justice... Economic Justice back to Liberal Hero... Oh my GOD! THE CAPITALIST GOALIE HAS TRIPPED. I Think that Mainstream Media just broke his arm.
Tom: Oh, that might be a season ending injury... And Liberal Hero... Has just gone to the stands to sign autographs.
Linda: THE BALL'S JUST SITTING THERE! What the HELL are you DOING, Liberal Hero? Oh... and... Religious Right.. just... he just... he just walked away with the ball. Oh my god... this is a fucking disaster.
Tom: Woah... Sorry about that folks, Linda's a big Liberal fan.
Linda: HE COULD HAVE SCORED A GOAL! HE WAS RIGHT FUCKING THERE! NO, no, you don't go sign fucking autographs in the middle of a game. What the Fuck, Tom?
Tom: Look, that's a lot of pressure, Linda?
Linda: And they just called time out! He's still signing autographs. What the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck, OH MY GOD. DO you SEE THIS SHIT? Come On, Tom, you can't tell me this is normal.
Tom: Linda, look if you can't handle the pressure at this level, maybe you should stick to the High School League.
(A long Pause)
Linda: (Quietly)Fuck you Tom... (Chipper) You know, what's really important, is that we support our team, no matter how hard things get. You have to buy tickets, you have to go to the matches, and you have to come out, otherwise the Liberals can't win. And we do that, by remembering that on our team, we have "Not Capitalist".
Tom: But the important thing is the game. If it wasn't for the game, none of us would have a job. And that goes for all of you watching as well. Love the Game, because it's the only one in town.