The fear of the unknown

I have absolutely no idea if I will have a business by the end of the year.
I also have absolutely no idea if I will die through the night, for that matter. Nor do any of you.
Ordinarily, I would be panicking about the future, but I have grown old now, and I have a truncated future anyway, pandemic or no pandemic.
I have returned to the mindset of my distant youth, when the nukes could drop and kill us all. Everyday of showing love and just giving meant you died doing the right thing. Peace. Love. Communal living.
I have talked most of the day and night with that person who means the world to me, and we went for humor. Lots and lots, those face hurt things you get for laughing for hours. An unforgettable day of joy and laughter to stave off fear.
If you truly think you might get sick and die tomorrow or next month, take this day to say "I love you" to your family, to everyone on your Facebook account, or your phone contacts, or your email list. They need to know.
Try to apologize to everyone you may have aggravated. Do not leave this world with hard feelings, no matter who is right, who is wrong. That doesn't matter, in the end.
Just weeks before my husband died, he went all over the vicinity, shook hands with everyone with whom me had gotten crossways. He made peace.
*I found out after his death that a neighbor, a horse trainer, had promised to him that he would be there if my horses got sick or injured... The neighbor made good on that promise. I remember him injecting my foundering horse with medicine, watching him for hours. Like, most of the night.
So, I am hoping we all live for this day for good, and leave a legacy of good.
In the meantime, think of a beautiful flying dove, and wish it was you up in the air, so free.

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Raggedy Ann's picture

only love. You are spot on in the ways our society needs to transition. We are shifting.

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The UFO’s are coming to unify us.

@Raggedy Ann @Raggedy Ann I love you, RA.
And La Paloma was yet another song I played on my piano for my parents to go to sleep.
They would request it on their way to bed.
I hope you listen to it and enjoy it.
It is great with morning coffee, or with that evening aperitif.

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Lookout's picture

This is one of OPOL's creations...

Lennon fro peace_0.jpg

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21 users have voted.

“Until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

@Lookout I miss him so.
He lived that "love and peace" life.
We were in contact every day he was in Costa Rico. I asked him to take a picture of a sloth. Every day, he would send me a picture of a bird, tell me sloths are harder to find than you would think!
That running joke lasted for months and months.
He did live a loving life, and did find peace.

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ggersh's picture

EDITED: original video didn't post

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15 users have voted.

“There are two ways to be fooled. One is to believe what isn't true; the other is to refuse to believe what is true.”

Søren Kierkegaard

NO MORE WAR

@ggersh I have decided I will spend my $1200 on my brother.
It would set my hands afire if I kept it to myself.

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ggersh's picture

www.ndtv.com

Look for Rhino does zoomie

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9 users have voted.

“There are two ways to be fooled. One is to believe what isn't true; the other is to refuse to believe what is true.”

Søren Kierkegaard

NO MORE WAR

Lookout's picture

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6 users have voted.

“Until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

ggersh's picture

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5 users have voted.

“There are two ways to be fooled. One is to believe what isn't true; the other is to refuse to believe what is true.”

Søren Kierkegaard

NO MORE WAR

@ggersh Got about 30 feet from a family, Mom, Dad, and baby. I was riding a horse at the time. It was in S. Africa. We also got within 10 feet of a rhino family in a jeep. The baby came and smelled of the jeep.
I saw a blind rhino in a rescue center in Nairobi. All surgeries failed. He walked close to the fence, and I got to scratch him behind his ear. He just smack his lips, exhaled. This lasted 5 minutes. I had to leave with my group, he grunted when I took my hand away.
They have a gentle streak. They do display love toward their handlers.
That video is awesome!
If a hippo can do it, so can we!

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gulfgal98's picture

This essay is so eloquent and brings me a lot of joy reading it.

The last several weeks have been weird for me personally. I am terrified to go out in public and yet I feel more at Peace than I have in some time. I absolutely had to go to the grocery store today and went at 7 am when they opened. The last time I was out was nearly three weeks ago. What a change. Three weeks ago, anyone wearing a mask looked out of place. This morning nearly everyone shopping was wearing a mask and giving distance and space to others. And it looked very normal.

Since the advent of the corona virus, I have been committed to showing my husband how much I appreciate him for things he does that I often previously took for granted. There is something about being forced to jump off the gerbil wheel for even a small amount of time that gives us the opportunity to take stock of what is really important in life even though times are very difficult. I pray that we as a people become better human beings as a result if we just try.

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19 users have voted.

Do I hear the sound of guillotines being constructed?

“Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable." ~ President John F. Kennedy

@gulfgal98 I am a renown hugger. One to ten a day. Usually three at the convenience store, four at the office, three at the grocery store.
At this time, when I most need a damn hug, I can't get one and enjoy the comfort I so badly need.
Ah, it's the little things, isn't it?
Remember when we were young, struggling to find a job, find a spouse, and work towards living the good life?
Well, that good life has been yanked from our grasp.
All that is left is friendship.

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gulfgal98's picture

@on the cusp (((Hugs))) to you!

When we were lined up outside waiting for the store to open, everyone was careful to maintain at least six feet of distance between themselves and the nearest people. I am one of those people who often strikes up a conversation with a total stranger in a store. I love to speak to people when I am out and about, and now we are all living in a real sound of silence. Each of us in the grocery store today was like we were navigating around in our own mini isolation booths. It's weird.

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12 users have voted.

Do I hear the sound of guillotines being constructed?

“Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable." ~ President John F. Kennedy

@gulfgal98 You do not have to utter a word to someone at a funeral, at a graduation ceremony, or at the airport. All you need to do is give a hug.
I feel I have lost a huge section of my vocabulary!

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and takes five.

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@JtC coffee house, drink expresso, snap my fingers.
Of course, snapping fingers in 5/4 time is hard!
I mean, HAIRD!

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enhydra lutris's picture

@on the cusp

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That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

@enhydra lutris try to snap fingers?
Or were you suggesting spooning? lol!

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mhagle's picture

I am 60 miles south of Dallas and you are I think much further south. Otherwise, when I did an egg run and put eggs in the mailboxes of my dear friends, I could have brought you eggs as well.

Are you able to plant things? You may have said this already, but do you have a pet?

Sad you lost your husband, but glad you have a fabulous best friend.

If there is anything I can do?

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Marilyn

"Make dirt, not war." eyo

@mhagle @mhagle I can plant, just no longer do that. I have a neighbor that brings me eggs from time to time. I am good to go. Take care of your neighbors!
My husband died so long ago that it is another life, another life time, to try and remember how it was then.
I had gone to work, he had said he was going to take a drive around town.
That apology tour was the last time he drove, and was the last time he got out of bed. He knew what was coming when I still held out hope for a miracle.
His last words were, "I love you."

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@on the cusp
Or did "I married ..." mean you officiated at the ceremony?
I was a bit confused at that post, but it was so beautiful, I didn't want to question it.

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5 users have voted.

I've seen lots of changes. What doesn't change is people. Same old hairless apes.

@The Voice In the Wilderness I militantly avoided dating for 17 years.
The "no dating" thing went into the trash bag a few months ago.
Thanks for the compliment.

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mhagle's picture

@on the cusp

Sad

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Marilyn

"Make dirt, not war." eyo

QMS's picture

it's a tough bite either way
understanding fear is half of the way
to getting around it
giving strength to others
when you have none
brings out the best in us

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14 users have voted.

@QMS To put it as simply as I can, my Dad charged off to war with no fear. He had beliefs that drove him right into battle without fear. He believed those SS Elites would harm his family and friends. He believed he could protect them.
He set a fine example for me.

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@on the cusp
Hate is stronger than Love. Hate will drive you on up to and beyond the limits of endurance.
Hate strips off the veneer of civilization and turns you into a primeval predator.
It will consume you and destroy you, but for a moment, it will make you superhuman.

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I've seen lots of changes. What doesn't change is people. Same old hairless apes.

mhagle's picture

@The Voice In the Wilderness

I agree that hate is strong, but real pure unadulterated unselfish love is far stronger.

I have seen it in my own life. The power of love is crazy strong. Everywhere I apply it, it is amazing.

Thirty years ago I worked in a health club. One of our members was the most contrary bitchy old chicks I have ever encountered. I decided to love her. She became a great friend. After that, I was sold. I have not always succeeded in loveing since then, but everytime I have, it has been a miracle.

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Marilyn

"Make dirt, not war." eyo

thanatokephaloides's picture

@mhagle

I agree that hate is strong, but real pure unadulterated unselfish love is far stronger.

I have seen it in my own life. The power of love is crazy strong. Everywhere I apply it, it is amazing.

And it needs no Pervitin to help it work, either!

Smile

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"I say enough! If Israel wants to be the only superpower in the Middle East then they can put their own asses on the line and do it themselves. I want to continue to eat."
-- snoopydawg

QMS's picture

@The Voice In the Wilderness

turn down the hate dial a bit
love is the answer

Wink

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QMS's picture

@QMS

somebody dressed up as a bunny dancing
in the back of a pick up truck across the street
blasting 'here comes peter cotton tail'
whoo boy!

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Dawn's Meta's picture

@QMS Hunting is normal in central France, but prohibited now. But several neighboring farms must have coordinated the timing of a horn conversations.

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A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they know they shall never sit. Allegedly Greek, but more possibly fairly modern quote.

Consider helping by donating using the button in the upper left hand corner. Thank you.

QMS's picture

@Dawn's Meta

makes one want to go a'huntin
for somethin' worth baggin'
not sure the fox appreciate
all that warbling

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Dawn's Meta's picture

@QMS the sounds they get and the pitches are quite amazing. They have whole bands in villages. People have traditional dances and songs. Lots of fun especially on a pagan/christian jour de fête, the feast day of Saint Jean around the 21st of June. Bonfires; community meals; dancing and singing; call and response horn playing around fields. Priests come and enjoy the celebration as much as anyone else. Deeply rooted across France.

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A society grows great when old men plant trees in whose shade they know they shall never sit. Allegedly Greek, but more possibly fairly modern quote.

Consider helping by donating using the button in the upper left hand corner. Thank you.

@The Voice In the Wilderness History is written using wars and famines and plagues as benchmarks to the barely mentioned importance and effects of the love that came in between.
We are literally schooled to appreciate the profound effects of hatred.
Only a few poets described the in between history.

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thanatokephaloides's picture

@The Voice In the Wilderness

Hate strips off the veneer of civilization and turns you into a primeval predator.
It will consume you and destroy you, but for a moment, it will make you superhuman.

..... with a little help from Pervitin, also known as methamphetamine.

Bad

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"I say enough! If Israel wants to be the only superpower in the Middle East then they can put their own asses on the line and do it themselves. I want to continue to eat."
-- snoopydawg

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@Sirena I am very much enjoying the thread and hope it gives some comfort, maybe even joy, to my site compadres.

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Unabashed Liberal's picture

Ok

Pleasantry

Mollie

THANK YOU America's Physicians & Nurses, All Medical Personnel, First Responders, To Include Medical (EMT/Paramedics/Ambulance), Pharmacy Personnel, Fire Depts, Police Depts, Retailers/Grocers--Especially, To Marginally-Paid Frontline Retail Cashiers & Clerks.

Last, but not least,

THANKS to America's Truckers/Delivery Persons, Especially, To Over-The-Road/Long Haul Truckers Who Obviously Have The Capacity To Shut Down The Entire Country, If They Were To Choose To Sit Out The Current Public Health Crisis, In Order To Protect Their Own.

You are all truly heroes.

Godspeed. Give rose

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Everyone thinks they have the best dog, and none of them are wrong.

@Unabashed Liberal I mentor a young lawyer. I regularly give her the tricks of the trade advice.
Out of the blue, she called, said her parents are preppers, and that I must not do without. Just tell her what I need, and she will load it up, drive it to me, toss it over my fence.
The other call was from a lawyer who almost died from bone cancer, and she is still in treatment, really struggling. We have a divorce case, and she is frantic that we will not settle it, since she is not up for a trial.
I told her that the angrier she became at my recalcitrance, the more adrenaline she would have to get her up and walking! It is therapy! lol! She laughed, said she would call me more often because I can always make her laugh. Making a bad situation just a little better isn't that hard to do.

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Anja Geitz's picture

With hard feelings. Your words hit me right in the heart, my friend. You inspired me to be a better version of myself. Thank you.

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11 users have voted.

There is always Music amongst the trees in the Garden, but our hearts must be very quiet to hear it. ~ Minnie Aumonier

@Anja Geitz and callousness on the part of our government. It seems to be rubbing off on people.
That is no way to live.
Kind gestures and sincere apologies go far in neutralizing the hardships of our lives.
You were, and are, always good, chica.

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enhydra lutris's picture

I have returned to the mindset of my distant youth, when the nukes could drop and kill us all.

Fatalism allowed us to be carefree, do what you can, fix what you can, but be free and be yourself, because you probably won't live long enough to ever even vote.

be well and have a good one

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That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

@enhydra lutris el. Nice of you to come and comment.

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enhydra lutris's picture

@on the cusp

me a long time to get to it. Wink

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That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

@enhydra lutris el. We should love our fellow man, and if we must fight, let it be the government who is in the ring with us.

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thanatokephaloides's picture

@on the cusp

We should love our fellow man, and if we must fight, let it be the government who is in the ring with us.

The government and the ultra-rich fuckers on whose behalf it always acts.

Biggrin

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"I say enough! If Israel wants to be the only superpower in the Middle East then they can put their own asses on the line and do it themselves. I want to continue to eat."
-- snoopydawg

Hawkfish's picture

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We can’t save the world by playing by the rules, because the rules have to be changed.
- Greta Thunberg

@Hawkfish Thanks for dropping into the thread!

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