Confessions of a broken-hearted Tulsicrat
Nobody ever accused alligators of being all that smart, except perhaps Pogo (Sobek love him). So, when I started getting wet behind the ears as the saying goes--or at least, one saying goes. There are more sayings than that. For one, I am fond of interspersing wise musings from the past into essays--this may often be done without attribution, in order to promote an aura of my cleverness. You may cease laughing for the moment and listen respectfully as I recite my political stupidity. Perhaps, as the attorneys say, this might bear some probative value. Most, if not all c99ers are well-past the stage of making bone-head political stances. But WTF do you expect from a thick-skulled alligator?
Please be patient, this ramble will eventually arrive at Tulsicratocracy--or you may proceed to the bottom or perhaps do something productive.
First, I have deep-seated political sin that I will only reveal on my death bed and only if I am in a good mood then. Now my first admissible sin was momentarily believing John McCain. I was cured of that attachment when he picked Sarah Politician to Nowhere Palin. Remind me to tell you of the pizza shop owner who used Sarah to baby sit their kids. Apparently not the sharpest knife in the drawer. But John McCain, the singing canary according to co-residents of the Hanoi Hilton was a fellow who never encountered a war he didn't like. When he was actively flying, spreading mayhem, there are incidents of where he took off flight decks so rapidly that there is a term for it. This hot take off leaves flames and uncombusted fuel behind the jet engines. This is not only inconsiderate but a practice officially frowned upon by Naval regulations. McCain McCain. Muaz Moustafa, Al-Baghdadi, Poroshenko,---fuck it, where didn't he do his filthy miss? Don't forget the Keating Five. And, oh yeah, how many homes he owned--McCain lost track. Brain tumor maybe. Trumpian rub-out perhaps.
I voted for Hope and Change once. Blecch!
My next notable political mistake was believing that Pocohontas, aka Liawatha, was a real progressive. Nope. Lizzy, aka whoizliz, is a real piece of work. Liz iz a real peice of work. Dreck. Unadulterated, certified 99.4% pure dreck.
Then Bernie. I loved Bernie. Still respect the dude for his ideas and his courage-within-limits. Contributed to Bernie as much as the millionaires and billionaires (i.e., $2700). Suppose that tags me as rich. Went to the Bern's enthusiastic Santa Maria CA rally which featured not only the usual English-Spanish translators, but also English to Misteco translators--and Misteco in sign language. Match that NYC or Chi town!
Pardon my sob. A sob consisting of involuntary emotional expression, which involves involuntary exhalation while enunciating involuntarily soft gasping accompanied by sad facies with or without some tearfulness. Sobs may also be noted to be immediately preceded by sharp, abrupt inhalations resulting in sudden bilateral shoulder elevation.
Where the Eff is this going?
Hang on. Tulsi, here we come.
Bernie broke my heart when he kissed the ring of the Giant Rat of Chappaqua. Ugh. All over. Good bye. It's done. My heart, politically was broken. Crushed. Arrgh! Hurt so bad. Ooh. It was like my divorce from the first Mrs. Gator.
By the time Bernie screwed me over (and others also), I had journeyed from the Great Orange Satan to the friendly environs of c99. In response to a posted comment by me, one of our wise members, whose name I don't recall, said to me "this is just the first heartache you'll get [from politics]".
Vowing never to get suckered again, I continued undeterred by all political pleas and seduction of the political class. That is, until the siren song of Tulsi Gabbard. Then, I, like a big dumb fish, open-end my mouth widely and inserted the hook myself into my oral cavity.
This time, caution did restrain my financial generosity. I don't regret my modest donations to Tulsi. She has a good message. Basically she has a kind heart but a will of steel. When Tulsi becomes president, under whichever partei banner she chooses, Tulsi will rule as the iron fist in a velvet glove. Make no mistake about this. Tulsi's resolve is solid although I do not know what her deep intentions are.