unimportant personal - things I can't wrap my mind around -

I went back to the Dailykos site today, into which I can't log into anymore, to search for something. Basically I wanted to let Sarah R and her sister Winglion know that I like to contact them to thank them for the quilts they once made for me and tell them that their quilt overs my bed til today. I also wanted to tell Aji and Wings that their beautiful image (the ladder that leads to heaven) and their kind cards they wrote are placed on my bookshelves and I look at them from my bed and I have fond memories doing so. I wished I could tell navajo that I enjoyed to have met her personally in DC together with teacherken (I was kind of intimidated by him).

So I looked around a bit in the old sandbox and I was surprised to realize that I seem now to be real, real old.

I joined dailykos in march 2004 and I remember how that came about. I had a sort of isolated outsider immigrant-like life in Washington DC in comparison of the USian crowd here on C99p. I came to the US with a lot of skepticism about the country. I didn't really want to come, but did, because I am a good wife. Wink My fears were affirmed pretty fast. I knew I would not be able to raise my son in the US on my own and all I had in mind was to make sure he would be able to go back to Germany when he would reach his college years.

Of course, my little boy, thought it was exiting to be a Washingtonian. Kids in his German school even called him 'Washington'.

Dailykos was just 6 months old. How did I end up reading dailykos early on? It was just a coincidence.

For whatever - in hindsight unfortunate - circumstances, my son joined the US Air Force in April 2000, believing it could help him to get ahead after a very, confusing life before coming to the US at age 10. What kind of life he had before that in Europe is worth a movie. The life he had after coming to the US is more of a psychological conspiracy story for a child. But WTF snow from yesterdays.

So, one day, someone convinced him to join the Army to better his life's and get going. He joined the US Air Force in April 2000 when GWBush just had become President. There is a joke between me and my son, because when I heard Bush the first time speak, I told my son, he is kinda cute ...ouch, can you believe that? I changed my mind a couple of months later about that. So, just say nothing, ok?

And at the next blink of an eye he was dropped off into his first AFB base in Montana, where he had to clean up the outside areas of the nuclear missile silos among other tasks. That was after he was shuffled around from Lackland Airforce Base I visited him there for graduation from the basic training program. I thought it was ...never mind ... Then he was swnt to the middle of somewheree for technical training and to Panama. He never was allowed to tell me anything, so I don't know why he was in Panama. Everything is top secret in the military. Of course./ they have to be secretive, otherwise ... oh well.

9/11 tower attacks happened and before he knew it, he was sent to NYC a couple of days after to help clean up the rubble and extinguish the smoldering fires. So, he smelled it up close and in the dirt.

I was working as a little old ldady accountant at a German conservative think tank in the Washington DC office at that time (where I managed to get my boss fired for stealing over 300,000.00 dollars from German taxpayers money from the think tank's bank account. I had to make sure I knew about that. Otherwise I would have made myself an accomplice in that crime, if I had not made the headquarters in Germany aware of what that DC office's chef was doing). So, at least it shows that I can count. /s

Anyhow, I sat at my little, tiny desk, squeezed into a corner of the hallways, and watched the bombardment of Bagdad's famously named "Shock and Awe" attack on Saddam Hussein's compound.

and knew my son flew into Iraq towards his base in Kuweit exactly the same day, watching the fires from his plane.

I just thought, what the hell he has gotten himself into. I don't want to talk about what the six month he was in the Iraq war has done to my son. But the damage is substantial and I don't forgive the Americans for sending the troops into Iraq. Period. So, my son was smart enough to sign up for Korea for a year to avoid being deployed to Iraq again. I visited him in Korea. Well, he survived that too.

Totally appalled by that war's beginning, I somehow found the dailykos site, who at that time expressed strong opinions against that war. So it became my go to place from that day on.

While searching the dailykos site, I realized that I am an oldy and many of you are babies compared to me. Smile

JtC joined dailykos in August 14, 2010. What? How could it be that I got to fear the Conqueroo man since I came over here to C99p. Wink It had something to do with an alligator, who I did not understand and he didn't like that that I liked the alligator. Menno, JtC, let's talk about crocodiles and forget alligators, ok?

And Joe Shikspack joined Dailykos in Jan 4, 2006. Wow, I am even older than he. And I don't remember him as a DFH or an anarchist or rebel./fool me once, shame on him, fool me twice shame on me

Over the years reading dailykos I became enervated over a couple of writers there. I guess a couple of people over there became enervated with me, because when I send out my good buy letter I was 'fired' and 'banned' before the 'ink was dry'.

So, somehow the Rusty user's comments lead me to C99p. There I saw that he had written a book. Anyhow, I wanted to thank the Rusty man that he managed to lead a dummy like me to C99p.

Wny do I write this up? Basically because I get tired, don't understand many commentator's lingo, I have too much in my head, and just want to try to get a little away from the internet. Like smiley7 ... Btw I wanted to say that I like members, who have expressive nick names. Smiley is my favorite. Lookout the second next favorite. Enhydra Lutris I just looked up its meaning now. Should have done this a long time ago. Anyhow. It is hard to live the distance internet life, where nothing is provable. I had it for too long and I hate the IT technology for what it offers even though I use it and have to use it. I think it's the worst invention in the last century second just to the nuclear bomb. I do not like social distancing over the internet.

I wanted to thank you all for your kindness for your comments directed to me and say that I respect many of you for their essays, knowledge, humor, comments, kindness and all the music. It is a wonderful blog. Keep it going. Fight and if you can speak English for Foreigners, so that they understand you a little easier. And in case you didn't get my English of Foreigner's jokes or sarcasm, ok, why should I be the only one who doesn't understand something. /Schadenfreude has its place

Stay safe, stay healthy, if you can, and help each other, as much as possible.

Oh, and I forgot, one day I want to meet Joe Shikspack again and drink a sixpack of Corona Beer with him. I want to know if he wants all my English books and records. I am writing my will ...

Ok, enough air kissing around.

Behave better than me. Have a good one, all.

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mimi's picture

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10 users have voted.

"heh, as they say, if you don't dig the blues, you got a hole in your soul" - JS

Raggedy Ann's picture

So interesting that you found TOP in 2004. I didn't find them until 2008 but didn't join until 2011.

Hope you are well! Cheers! Drinks

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13 users have voted.

Fear is the opposite of love. "Ignorance creates fear. Fear creates hatred. Hatred creates violence. We fear that of which we are ignorant. Cure ignorance to cure fear. If there is nothing to fear there's nothing to hate." Daryl Davis

Shahryar's picture

Can't post though since I have no idea what my password is and no interest in finding out. I have 4 bars of mojo despite being gone since March 4th, 2016 (it says here).

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9 users have voted.

and keeping on to the best of your ability just fine like most here. Even if we're not too numerous. Which is actually a plus because it diminishes the ability of cliques and gangs to form that seek to oust those not 100% to their liking. That condition lasted only about a year at TOP - fall 2002 to fall 2003 - but intensified over the years as it became more captured by the Democratic Party groupthink. There were always new arrivals that were good people. Most of whom were smart or savvy enough not to hang around for long. I was neither.

It's difficult to care when most people don't, but that spark of optimism in us is difficult to extinguish and leads us to keep trying.

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11 users have voted.
janis b's picture

Your essay is a wonderful story from a very special place.

From my experience of Germans, personally and objectively, they are direct in both subtle and obvious ways. It’s a quality that I grew to admire and benefit from.

I hope your son’s varied and challenging experiences will ultimately prove to have enhanced his life experience. I’m sorry he was unfairly lured and treated by the US military.

If you want any messages passed on to people at DKos, you can write and send them to me, and I will post them.

All the best always mimi

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11 users have voted.

dates of participating in TOS..

I joined in June of 2012 and was bojoed in Oct. of 2018. I started looking at some of my old comments. That's a trip back in time for sure. New format and new names and lots of Biden worshipping. UGH!

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6 users have voted.

"Without the right to offend, freedom of speech does not exist." Taslima Nasrin

enhydra lutris's picture

unimportant, it's the most important stuff there is. In the end, in fact, it is all there is. There are things one cannot wrap one's mind around, not unless one is half crazy, like the US war on Iraq, or all of our wars and killing or having enough nukes to destroy all life on the planet. Who knows, maybe that's why we talk crazy at times.

be well and have a good one

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6 users have voted.

That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

(Banned for the first time that is). Wasn't fooled by Obama and saw through the propaganda gang at TOS.
Felling old now lol.

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3 users have voted.