The Skin Horse Speaks

"What is a LEADER?" asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. "Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?"

"A LEADER isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. It's realizing that every experience develops some latent force within you.1 You begin to understand that vision is the art of seeing the invisible2 so that when you want to build a wagon, you don’t gather the other toys to collect wood or assign them tasks, but rather you teach them to long for ways to traverse the endless immensity of the backyard.3 Then you become a LEADER."

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"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit. "Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are a LEADER you don't mind being hurt. Leaders don't inflict pain. They bear pain." 4 "Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?" "It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. And while talent will get most of the attention, it is... a gift. Good character, by contrast, is not given to us. We have to build it piece by piece... by thought, choice, courage, and determination.5 Generally, by the time you are a LEADER, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. "But these things don't matter at all, because once you are LEADER, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious ... these will be things you think about." 6 "I suppose you are real LEADER?" said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive. But the Skin Horse only smiled. "The Boy's Uncle taught me that real LEADERS never, for the sake of peace and quiet, deny their own experience or convictions," 7 he said. "That was a great many years ago; but once you are a Real LEADER you can't become unreal again. It lasts for always. Because you know that everything can be taken from you but one thing: the last freedom... to choose one's attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one's own way." 8 The Rabbit sighed. He thought it would be a long time before this magic happened to him. He longed to know what it felt like; and yet the idea of growing shabby and losing his eyes and whiskers was rather sad. He wished that he could become it without these uncomfortable things happening to him. It would take him time to learn how many cares disppear when you decide not to be something, but to be someone.9
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...hoping that Margery Williams wouldn't mind my re-telling of her most excellent story (and one of my favorites), The Velveteen Rabbit. The wonderful illustration is by William Nicholson. Further, I hope those below don't mind my fitting their quotes into this story:

1 John R. Miller
2 Jonathan Swift
3 Antoine de Saint-Exupery
4 Max DePree
5 John Luther
6 Philippians 4:8
7 Dag Hammarskjold
8 Victor Frankl
9 Coco Chanel
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“Some believe there is nothing one man or one woman can do against the enormous array of the world's ills -- against misery, against ignorance, or injustice and violence. Yet many of the world's great movements, of thought and action, have flowed from the work of a single man. A young monk began the Protestant reformation, a young general extended an empire from Macedonia to the borders of the earth, and a young woman reclaimed the territory of France. It was a young Italian explorer who discovered the New World, and 32 year old Thomas Jefferson who proclaimed that all men are created equal. ‘Give me a place to stand,’ said Archimedes, ‘and I will move the world.’ These men (and women) moved the world, and so can we all.” Robert F. Kennedy

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pfiore8's picture

and repost every now and again. The last time was in 2013, in honor or RiaD, who had just passed. It was one of her favorites.

This time, I post to honor the inspiration of Bernie Sanders.

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“There are moments which are not calculable, and cannot be assessed in words; they live on in the solution of memory… ”
― Lawrence Durrell, "Justine"

Bisbonian's picture

Generally, by the time you are a LEADER, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby.

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"I’m a human being, first and foremost, and as such I’m for whoever and whatever benefits humanity as a whole.” —Malcolm X

enhydra lutris's picture

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That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

pfiore8's picture

da kine? help me out here!

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“There are moments which are not calculable, and cannot be assessed in words; they live on in the solution of memory… ”
― Lawrence Durrell, "Justine"

Martha Pearce-Smith's picture

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Please help the Resilience Resource Library grow by adding your links.

First Nations News

detroitmechworks's picture

Then again, so did a lot of sad stories.

Empathic kids sure do seem to get shamed a lot in our society. Just an observation.

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I do not pretend I know what I do not know.

pfiore8's picture

I was introduced to "what is real" in philosophy class in my freshman year at college. i was stunned by it. The slide the prof used attributed it to Ms. Williams but didn't give the name of the book. After class I said: where is this from? that was the first time I'd heard about "the Velveteen Rabbit" . . .

i few weeks later i was in Boston for the weekend and, browsing in a bookstore, found the slim volume and it has been with me ever since.

it is at the core of my belief system.

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“There are moments which are not calculable, and cannot be assessed in words; they live on in the solution of memory… ”
― Lawrence Durrell, "Justine"

Ravensword's picture

This was a very touching story. Thanks for sharing it.

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pfiore8's picture

I should change "story" to snippet from the story. But it is the heart of the story. Glad you enjoyed it.

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“There are moments which are not calculable, and cannot be assessed in words; they live on in the solution of memory… ”
― Lawrence Durrell, "Justine"

I've always loved the Velveteen Rabbit.
If you haven't, yet, read Voyage to the Bunny Planet, you might enjoy that too.

Speaking of Bawsthan, I still read Make Way for Ducklings

Thank you for dedicating it to Bernie Sanders. Guess everyone knows he "recorded" spoken word This Land. A group of musicians in Burlington VT got together and recorded this in tribute to Bernie. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q3aqV-f7tEo
When he and Jane were back in Burlington for the Super Tuesday results, these musicians joined them on stage and they all sang together.
There was a copy of that video on BNR, I don't have it.

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pfiore8's picture

and I do love "children's" books. Another of my favorites is a modern classic, "Walter the Farting Dog" . . . priceless!

but I will find them, Bunny Planet and Make Way for Ducklings (because I do love ducks and would love to have one live with us!).

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“There are moments which are not calculable, and cannot be assessed in words; they live on in the solution of memory… ”
― Lawrence Durrell, "Justine"