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Email from the GOP

Submitted by fire with fire on Sun, 11/09/2025 - 5:15pm

NRSC HQ
TO: You

Friend,

We noticed your answer to Question 8 on our Voter Verification Questionnaire … and we have to ask:

Are you sure that’s what you meant?

Your input is POWERFUL — it could directly influence how we shape the Republican platform for 2026.

That’s why we’re double-checking…

If you want to review or update your response, you can do that HERE:

Revisit your survey

Update your responses

We’re counting on engaged conservatives like you to lead the way. And every answer matters.

Thank YOU,

— GOP Strategy Team

Of course I am not a Republican. And I did not respond to any Voter Verification Questionnaire. It is a minor quibble to point that out. Far more damning is the preposterous premise that either Party as a whole is concerned with the granular details of what their rank-and-file members want from politics.

I got a hearty chuckle out of this crap. Submitted for amusement purposes only.

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GOP
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12 users have voted.

Comments

Submitted by QMS on Sun, 11/09/2025 - 5:38pm
QMS's picture

.
they must be getting desperate
to find some dupes to support their
mission, as it obviously not working.

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7 users have voted.
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Zionism is a social disease

Submitted by Lookout on Sun, 11/09/2025 - 5:58pm
Lookout's picture

...and powerful. Social media in particular delivers a punch.

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9 users have voted.
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“Until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

Submitted by fire with fire on Mon, 11/10/2025 - 3:02pm

Hey there, it’s Kellyanne…

This might just be the single most important email I’ve ever sent. I have a few pressing matters to discuss with you sooner rather than later.

1. Republicans have an extremely slim Majority in the House – if we lose even a handful of seats, Democrats will retake FULL CONTROL to blockade everything your President wants to do

2. The DNC Chair JUST announced their "largest-ever investment" into Democrat state parties, giving them a major leg up

3. The latest FEC reports have Democrats raising $47 MILLION in the last few months

When I ran President Trump’s first campaign back in 2016, I never had the luxury to beat around the bush or mince words around headquarters. I had to be blunt and tell it like it is…

And that’s why I’m going to say this in no uncertain terms:

I’m getting VERY worried about the Midterms. The Democrat Machine and Socialists like AOC are barnstorming red territory we have to win, we’re getting crushed in fundraising and resources are drying up, and we have virtually no buffer in the House.

And if this email fails, we'll lose.

I see no other option than to ask our best supporters for some help. Would you be willing to make a ten or twenty-dollar donation to save our vulnerable House Majority before our FINAL deadline?

YES >>
NO >>

Listen, it’s never my first instinct to ask folks for money.

I’m betting you probably get emailed often enough already (probably too much)...

Unfortunately, I know from the campaign trail that fundraising can mean the difference between victory and defeat. And with the President’s legislative agenda depending largely on Republican control of the House, I knew I had to email you ASAP.

Here’s my plan: I set a goal to get every Conservative I can reach with this email to pitch in JUST ten or twenty dollars.

If everyone reading this gives that much, we’ll catch up just in time before our final deadline. Can I count on you?
YES >>
NO >>
Thanks for all you do for freedom.

– Kellyanne Conway

The unintentional comedy from Kellyanne is the panic over "Socialists like AOC" and "The Democrat Machine" making their pitch on Red Turf. The answer to this impending crisis for MAGA Nation is the same answer to every question in the Red and Blue Electioneering World -- MONEY!!!

The unarticulated but obvious premise is that money turns votes no matter the context. Government for sale to the highest bidder.

Like a stopped watch twice a day. Ms.Conway has a point there.

Is this a great country or what?

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7 users have voted.
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I cried when I wrote this song. Sue me if I play too long.

Submitted by fire with fire on Mon, 11/10/2025 - 3:39pm

I was never supposed to be President.

I was never supposed to survive the bullet of an assassin, BUT I DID.

I was never supposed to be President of the United States again, BUT I AM.

I was never supposed to Make America Great Again, BUT I WILL NEVER SURRENDER!

The great behemoth known as the Democrat Party threw everything at me: Hoaxes, Witch Hunts, Impeachments, Election Interference, Raids, Arrests, and so much more!

But the steady compass of Faith has guided my hands through it all.

NOW, the government is completely shut down, and they think MAGA IS DONE.

We can’t take our foot off the gas!

I was saved for this one reason: to Make America Great Again.

I was made for this, BUT MAGA IS POWERED BY YOU.

That’s why I’ve launched a 24 HOUR TRUMP FUNDRAISING BLITZ, and I’m asking everyone to chip in $15 to make it one for the record books!

Every time they count us out – count YOU out – we come back bigger, better, and stronger than ever before.

This is our moment to show the world that we will NEVER back down, NEVER give an inch, and NEVER SURRENDER in our fight to save this country.

So if you’re with me all the way to the end, join with MILLIONS of your fellow PATRIOTS by chipping in $15 to keep the wins rolling in!

GIVE $15

STAND WITH TRUMP

I appreciate the restraint shown by the grown-up Eddie Haskell as he only hints at Divine Intervention from God as a MAGA supporter.

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6 users have voted.
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I cried when I wrote this song. Sue me if I play too long.