Saturday Open Thread 01-31-15
BATON ROUGE, LA—Citing the intense pressures and scrutiny placed on political candidates and the people in their lives, Louisiana governor Bobby Jindal announced Tuesday that he’s not sure he wants to put his family through the rigors of a two-month presidential campaign.
The 43-year-old former congressman told reporters that while his wife and three young children are tremendously supportive of his political ambitions, he recognizes that a relentless six-to-eight-week run for the White House would be hard on them nonetheless.
“If I were to declare my candidacy this June, I’d immediately have to head out on the campaign trail and would likely be apart from my family for as much as half the summer—that’s a sacrifice I really have to think about,” Jindal said of a potential bid for the Republican Party’s 2016 presidential nomination. “We’re talking four, maybe five big town hall events in the early primary states, a handful of public rallies, and a few Sundays spent at meet-and-greets with local voters. That’s multiple weekends on the road, and I’m not sure it would be fair to my kids.”
Michele Bachmann claimed today that Muslims invented global warming in hopes of weakening the American economy before a full-scale jihadi invasion.
In an interview with Fox Business this morning, the former congresswoman from Minnesota was asked her opinion on the recent report that 2014 was the warmest year on record, a fact most scientists believe is linked to human-induced climate change.
“Muslims created the global warming hoax so we bankrupt ourselves switching to renewable energy,” Bachmann told a stunned Neil Cavuto. “Once our economy is completely destroyed, our military power will crumble, leaving us exposed to their jihadi invasion force.
Glendale| A team of scientists of the National Aeronautics and Space Administration (NASA) arrived this morning at the University of Phoenix Stadium, where they have been summoned to test the inflation level of the footballs destined to be used during the Superbowl XLIX game on Sunday.
The experts have been convoked by the National Football League to avoid any further controversy after the “deflate gate” scandal which tarnished the victory of the New England Patriots in the AFC championship game against the Indianapolis Colts on January 18.
This controversy started when league officials inspected the footballs during the halftime of the championship game and noticed that the air pressure levels of the twelve balls under the Patriots’ control were below the level mandated by the NFL rulebook. Patriots head coach Bill Belichick and quarterback Tom Brady have denied any wrongdoing, but the NFL has ordered an investigation on the subject which could lead to a 50,000$ fine for the team.
Barack Obama has used genetics to manufacture the most powerful virus in the history of mankind. The virus is an evolved form of EBOLA, a deadly virus that causes the body to bleed to death in a week.
According to sources, there is an antidote for the virus. The cure was tested at the CDC facility in Georgia this week, where an infected doctor has been nearly cured, against all odds.
Keep in mind, Obama-era evolution of Ebola has already killed thousands in Africa, and only moments ago, a person dropped dead in London from Obama-Ebola.
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