How not to run a bank

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The two men in the photo above are NOT bankers. They are tailors.
So why have I included them in this essay?
Because of where they are on that particular day.

Deutsche Bank CEO Christian Sewing says he reprimanded executives for having expensive custom suits tailored the day that mass layoffs hit the troubled bank’s offices in London, New York and Tokyo.

Two tailors were photographed coming out of the German bank’s London office on Monday. Originally, the men were incorrectly identified as employees who had been sacked.

In reality, they were at Deutsche’s London office to fit $1,800 suits for senior staff who were not hit by the job cuts, according to a report in Financial News.

Even the cost of the suits, at $1,800, is in poor taste, because 18,000 people were getting canned that day.
And yet, getting rid of all of these people still didn't save the bank from losing $3.46 billion last quarter. The bank isn't just laying off people. It's shutting down parts of it's business.

The lender is cutting 18,000 jobs while dramatically shrinking its investment banking business, shuttering its equities sales and trading unit while cutting back its rates division.
It's also creating a "bad bank" for €74 billion ($83 billion) in assets that eat up too much capital. Those assets will be sold over the coming years, freeing up money to invest elsewhere.
... The company's stock, which hit a record low in June, is down almost 3% since the turnaround plan was announced — hardly a vote of confidence.

The $83 billion "bad bank" is another controversial issue, with many questioning the price of those assets.

It's hard to list a major scandal in the world that Deutsche Bank wasn't involved in. Don't believe me?
Allow me to show you.

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Yes, Donald Trump's favorite bank was also a favorite of pedophile Jeffrey Epstein.

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Did you like the movie The Wolf Of Wall Street starring Leonardo DiCaprio? I know I did.
Isn't it interesting that some of the money used to produce the movie about Wall Street corruption was actually stolen by Wall Street crooks?
Talk about life imitating art.

Laundering $10 Billion for Russian oligarchs? Deutsche Bank has been there.

Rigging the Libor? Been there, done that.

Intentionally violating sanctions against Iran, Syria, Libya and Sudan? Wouldn't miss it.

Selling bad mortgages? Of course!


Carbon trading fraud?
Are you kidding!

Spying on critics? Why not!

Deutsche Bank has paid more than $13 billion for litigation since 2012.
And that's just the illegal stuff.

Guess who funded the Dakota Access Pipeline?
Remember, this is the same bank that helped seize the property of Jews in the 1930's, and "provided banking for the Gestapo and loaned the money to build the Auschwitz concentration death camp."

And yet all that lying and stealing haven't kept DB stock from hitting all-time lows, and thus threatening it's very existence.

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But don't you worry. Deutsche Bank won't go under. Do you know why?
Because their derivative position is so massive that Europe can't allow DB from going under.
They'll get bailed out instead.
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ggersh's picture

Here’s the short version on why the bank is contemplating these radical moves: Deutsche Bank has reported losses in three of the last four years; its share price has lost 90 percent of its value since February of 2007; as of the close of trading on Wednesday, Deutsche had $16.14 billion in common equity value versus $49 trillion notional (face amount) in derivatives; it’s had four different CEOs in just over four years; it can’t find a merger partner; and its home country of Germany, unlike the “throw money at the Wall Street mega banks” U.S. government, doesn’t seem inclined to hand a life line to Deutsche Bank’s sinking hulk.

http://wallstreetonparade.com/2019/07/the-fed-and-wall-street-have-their...

Yet somehow this happened

Europe's biggest banks pass 2018 ECB stress test

Deutsche Bank (DB +2.1%), Europe's biggest bank, did better than some predicted, with a core tier of 8.14% under the adverse scenario.

https://seekingalpha.com/news/3404880-europes-biggest-banks-pass-2018-ec...

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I never knew that the term "Never Again" only pertained to
those born Jewish

"Antisemite used to be someone who didn't like Jews
now it's someone who Jews don't like"

Heard from Margaret Kimberley

k9disc's picture

We good here?
Right on...

Sincerely,
Lloyds of London
@ggersh

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“Tactics without strategy is the noise before defeat.” ~ Sun Tzu

Bank Bailout Part Deux.

Hey, fellow Radicals, I have a radical idea! How about letting private businesses that screw up fail and cease to exist as Libertarians are always telling us that private people that make mistakes should. Isn't that your Adam Smith Laissez-Faire conclusion? Yes, little people will be hurt in the crash,. Government should protect them, not failed Dinosaurs.

Let the free market work. isn't that what republicans and neo-liberal Democrats have been telling we little people?

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I've seen lots of changes. What doesn't change is people. Same old hairless apes.