This is why Chris Cornell's passing has me so bummed out

Submitted by bondibox on Sat, 05/20/2017 - 1:41pm

This week we received the sad news that Seattle rocker Chris Cornell had passed away. At first I was mildly grieved, mostly because of his young age. I guess it's been a while since I enjoyed his music. I found an old favorite, Temple of the Dog, and put it on. It moved me to tears.

This essay may have me come across as an expert on the Seattle Grunge scene. I'm not. I've never even been to Seattle. I just know what I felt.

I was born in 1967, so by the time I started getting into music there was an ample amount of classic albums available for me to listen to over and over. But I didn't feel as if I owned any of that music. I wasn't involved in the process of it becoming big. Since then, there have been two genres which I did claim as mine. The first was the beginning of the New Wave / 80's rock era. Blondie, The Knack, Depeche Mode, Men Without Hats, The Sherbs. These are some of the bands I discovered playing on Connecticut's 95.1 "I 95" (with a touch of an 'h') and across the Sound coming from WLIR on Long Island.

The other genre which I adopted as my own was Grunge.

When I moved to Louisville KY in the early 90's I made a friend named Kevin Wettle. Kevin, or "Shaggy" as he became known, was born with a severe cleft palate, and after countless childhood surgeries was left with a disfigured lip and chronic sinus problems. I've had a few real good friends in my life. Some real brothers. No one was as good a friend to me as Kevin. Grunge was part of part of Kevin's soul. He lived grunge. Oh, sure he showered just like you and me, but he was not well manicured as they say. His apartment was a stale mess of cigarette butts and nearly empty beer cans filled with more cigarette butts. The carpet had seen about a hundred of these cans knocked over.

Kevin turned me onto that great Seattle band, MuddyTempleoftheGreenPearlMotherloveGarden, as well as other Sub Pop greats like King Missile, Jesus Mary Chain, Screaming Trees, Poster Children, John Spencer and others.

The movie Singles was released in September 1992, which means all throughout that winter Chris Cornell's soundtrack-driving song Seasons ruled the radio airwaves. For all of you twentysomethings who may be hearing that song for the first time this week, picture it against a bleak and dreary winter backdrop. Picture a cold and empty landscape with the thin sounding acoustic guitar, hypnotically repetitive, echoing of a chilly PacNorth rainy day. For months, nearly the whole country felt like Seattle, and the radio turned it into a soundtrack for our lives.

Now I want to fly above the storm
But you can't grow feathers in the rain
And the naked floor is cold as hell
This naked floor reminds me
Oh the naked floor reminds me

You can't talk about Seattle Grunge bands without mentioning Andrew Patrick Wood, one of the founding members of Mother Love Bone. Andrew succumbed to heroin addiction in 1990, and since then every album has been an homage to Andrew, every song has him lurking in the shadows. The Seattle story is really a story about the survivors.

And I'm lost, behind
The words I'll never find
And I'm left behind
As seasons roll on by

Despite his social pariah status, I was compelled to make Kevin my friend because he was so absolutely authentic. Completely unabashed, he told it like it was. One time a girl I was dating asked me to pick her up from work. When I got there she didn't even say 'hi' to me. Kevin was there, and picking up on the vibe he quoted a Poster Children song. "Blatant Dis." It was a smack of stark reality, a confirmation that my life really kind of did suck at that moment, and all that you could do was laugh at the pain.

There is a lot of that same authenticity in the early Seattle grunge bands. They weren't grungy because it was a gimmick (coughstonecoughtemplecoughpilotscough), they were grungy because they were grungy. Like punk, grunge was in-your-face with the truth along with a "buck up and deal with it" message.

The throwing away of all pretenses made the music tremendously grounded. In a way, it reminds me of The Allman Brothers Band - real people going through real hard times.

That's what Chris Cornell represented to me. The friend who you could rely on because he'd been down too, he'd been all the way down to bedrock, and who wouldn't let you down because he knew the value of friendship. Chris Cornell was like the best friend I never met.

Toward the end of the grunge decade, Kevin succumbed to the dangers of drug addiction like so many others. For a while Chris Cornell felt like the only friend I had left.

Chris hanged himself after performing Led Zeppelin's In My Time Of Dying. Here was a tremendously pained soul, but someone who by all accounts seemed to have put his demons behind him. Reports have it that all of the members of Soundgarden are now sober. Was there an element of addiction to his despair? Was a cold hard sobriety too bleak for him to continue? Or was it the pain of ending a relationship?

It could have been any, or all of these things. But what bothers me is Chris had seen the demons before and he had advice for the rest of us:

Don't try to do it
Don't try to kill your time, oh
Yeah, you might do it
Then you can't change your mind, oh

But if somebody left you out on a ledge
If somebody pushed you over the edge
If somebody loved you and left you for dead
You got to hold on to your time till you break
Through these times of trouble

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Comments

Submitted by HenryAWallace on Sat, 05/20/2017 - 1:59pm

Thank you. It stinks when a bright light is extinguished.

Then, we just have to be glad for the works he, she or they left to us.

Submitted by Daenerys on Sat, 05/20/2017 - 3:37pm

Very sad indeed.

I was at work Thursday when the news hit. I work with some music nerds and we talked about it and were sad all day. I loved Soundgarden and Audioslave. He made some truly wonderful music. RIP

—

This shit is bananas.

Submitted by gulfgal98 on Sat, 05/20/2017 - 5:10pm

I am much older than you

but I was very saddened by Chris Cornell's death too. I was not into the grunge music scene, but his incredible voice always moved me when when I heard him sing. He could transcend any musical genre. It is particularly sad because he left behind a wife and three young children.

—

Do I hear the sound of guillotines being constructed?

“Those who make peaceful revolution impossible will make violent revolution inevitable." ~ President John F. Kennedy

Submitted by Cant Stop the M... on Sat, 05/20/2017 - 5:23pm

Shit. Oh, shit.

Wasn't a big grunge fan back in the day, but they always had my respect.

—

"More for Gore or the son of a drug lord--None of the above, fuck it, cut the cord."
--Zack de la Rocha

"I tell you I'll have nothing to do with the place...The roof of that hall is made of bones."
-- Fiver

Submitted by Mark from Queens on Sun, 05/21/2017 - 6:38pm

Thanks for the heartfelt essay, bondibox.

Still stunned and crushed.

Started to write something and put it aside. Instead I talked with friends who were also similar effected. Having trouble putting this one to rest - his depression and taking anti-anxiety meds which had negative effects that included suicidal tendencies, etc, the conflicted conclusions of his poor wife, the fact that the band was now sober and he seemed to have a new lease on life, the scope and breadth of his musical forays of late (amazing covers I wasn't aware of). Mental health is not discussed in this country with the seriousness it deserves. Neither is the evil racket of Big Pharma dispensing all sorts of toxic cocktails, via doctors who seem to be putting pen to prescription paper within a minute of ministering to patients.

Was glad to see your piece. The whole Sub Pop explosion really resonated deeply with me also. Still remember thinking it was going to be Mudhoney, and not Nirvana, who were going to the be the ones to break out big. Heh...

But Soundgarden was a whole other thing. Blew me away from the first note of "Flower" on Ultramega OK. Had a front row seat for the whole breakout of the Seattle scene as a fresh-faced kid out of college who got a dream job of working at a music industry magazine just as all of it was happening. Saw them so many times, from small clubs to private parties to arenas - and on so many cool and interesting bills, such as a triple bill with Faith No More and Voivod, to opening for GnR at MSG and Neil Young at Jones Beach, from Lollapalooza '92 in NY and then in San Francisco, to a loft in NYC for the live premier of Badmotorfinger to an old Armory building somewhere near Lexington in the 20's in sweltering heat. So many memories, turning on friends to them, the soundtrack to my young adulthood, etc. Loved your slight, also, of, who we would call, Clone Temple Pilots. The bands in the mid-90's who the labels forced on the public hoping to cash in on the grunge craze are not worth mentioning, completely laughable.

Best piece I read so far was the Charles Cross one. He was the photographer who shot all those iconic, frenetic, slightly blurred, b&w Sub Pop album covers and photos.

"It Began At The Ditto Tavern: Chris Cornell's Life As Grunge's True Seattle Son"

All those bands I felt a kinship with right away, as if they were my peers, comrades, mentors, brothers in arms. They were suburban kids too, who had grown up playing in their garages, and turned their love of the Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, Black Sabbath and punk rock into something special and powerful.

Thanks again for writing up your story. Brought back some great memories.

—

"If I should ever die, God forbid, let this be my epitaph:

THE ONLY PROOF HE NEEDED
FOR THE EXISTENCE OF GOD
WAS MUSIC"

- Kurt Vonnegut

Submitted by FutureNow on Sun, 05/21/2017 - 8:00pm

Mudhoney definitely deserved

@Mark from Queens
to occupy Pearl Jam's position amongst the Seattle "Big Four."

As to the matter of Soundgarden, though - never in my life have I heard a more muscular rock band, like a semi or a hurricane could have slammed into them and they still wouldn't have missed a beat.

Still stunned and crushed. Started to write something and put it aside. Instead I talked with friends who were also similar effected. Having trouble putting this one to rest - his depression and taking anti-anxiety meds which had negative effects that included suicidal tendencies, etc, the conflicted conclusions of his poor wife, the fact that the band was now sober and he seemed to have a new lease on life, the scope and breadth of his musical forays of late (amazing covers I wasn't aware of). Mental health is not discussed in this country with the seriousness it deserves. Neither is the evil racket of Big Pharma dispensing all sorts of toxic cocktails, via doctors who seem to be putting pen to prescription paper within a minute of ministering to patients. Was glad to see your piece. The whole Sub Pop explosion really resonated deeply with me also. Still remember thinking it was going to be Mudhoney, and not Nirvana, who were going to the be the ones to break out big. Heh... But Soundgarden was a whole other thing. Blew me away from the first note of "Flower" on Ultramega OK. Had a front row seat for the whole breakout of the Seattle scene as a fresh-faced kid out of college who got a dream job of working at a music industry magazine just as all of it was happening. Saw them so many times, from small clubs to private parties to arenas - and on so many cool and interesting bills, such as a triple bill with Faith No More and Voivod, to opening for GnR at MSG and Neil Young at Jones Beach, from Lollapalooza '92 in NY and then in San Francisco, to a loft in NYC for the live premier of Badmotorfinger to an old Armory building somewhere near Lexington in the 20's in sweltering heat. So many memories, turning on friends to them, the soundtrack to my young adulthood, etc. Loved your slight, also, of, who we would call, Clone Temple Pilots. The bands in the mid-90's who the labels forced on the public hoping to cash in on the grunge craze are not worth mentioning, completely laughable. Best piece I read so far was the Charles Cross one. He was the photographer who shot all those iconic, frenetic, slightly blurred, b&w Sub Pop album covers and photos. "It Began At The Ditto Tavern: Chris Cornell's Life As Grunge's True Seattle Son" All those bands I felt a kinship with right away, as if they were my peers, comrades, mentors, brothers in arms. They were suburban kids too, who had grown up playing in their garages, and turned their love of the Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, Black Sabbath and punk rock into something special and powerful. Thanks again for writing up your story. Brought back some great memories.

Submitted by Mark from Queens on Sun, 05/21/2017 - 9:26pm

Funny that you say that. Of the texts that came in that morning

@FutureNow
one was from my oldest friend in the world, who recalled us seeing them opening for Neil Young at Jones Beach, in which they took the stage to a torrential downpour of slashing rain. He wasn't as big a fan as I was, but he thought the way they barreled through the elements was something very impressive and unforgettable. They weren't in the slightest fazed, and plowed through as if on some heroic mission.

They were indeed an undeniable force of nature. Such sheer power, making odd times groove and thrash, just tremendous and so unique. And Cornell at the front, the quintessential Rock God, in his black, duct-taped Doc Martens and long black shorts - and nothing else (back in the day).

Mudhoney was one of the funnest bands to see. Total sloshing, raw punk rock energy. Saw a dude jump out of a balcony at one of their shows in NYC into the crowd, the band was tearing it up so much. They're very much in the annals of that scene, though they didn't sell the boatloads of records like the others.

(correction to above: Charles Peterson was the Sub Pop photographer, not writer Charles Cross)

—

"If I should ever die, God forbid, let this be my epitaph:

THE ONLY PROOF HE NEEDED
FOR THE EXISTENCE OF GOD
WAS MUSIC"

- Kurt Vonnegut

Submitted by Daenerys on Sun, 05/21/2017 - 10:59pm

It's especially hard

@Mark from Queens under these kind of circumstances. I don't think I'll ever be over Robin Williams' death either; that one felt like losing a dear friend.

Still stunned and crushed. Started to write something and put it aside. Instead I talked with friends who were also similar effected. Having trouble putting this one to rest - his depression and taking anti-anxiety meds which had negative effects that included suicidal tendencies, etc, the conflicted conclusions of his poor wife, the fact that the band was now sober and he seemed to have a new lease on life, the scope and breadth of his musical forays of late (amazing covers I wasn't aware of). Mental health is not discussed in this country with the seriousness it deserves. Neither is the evil racket of Big Pharma dispensing all sorts of toxic cocktails, via doctors who seem to be putting pen to prescription paper within a minute of ministering to patients. Was glad to see your piece. The whole Sub Pop explosion really resonated deeply with me also. Still remember thinking it was going to be Mudhoney, and not Nirvana, who were going to the be the ones to break out big. Heh... But Soundgarden was a whole other thing. Blew me away from the first note of "Flower" on Ultramega OK. Had a front row seat for the whole breakout of the Seattle scene as a fresh-faced kid out of college who got a dream job of working at a music industry magazine just as all of it was happening. Saw them so many times, from small clubs to private parties to arenas - and on so many cool and interesting bills, such as a triple bill with Faith No More and Voivod, to opening for GnR at MSG and Neil Young at Jones Beach, from Lollapalooza '92 in NY and then in San Francisco, to a loft in NYC for the live premier of Badmotorfinger to an old Armory building somewhere near Lexington in the 20's in sweltering heat. So many memories, turning on friends to them, the soundtrack to my young adulthood, etc. Loved your slight, also, of, who we would call, Clone Temple Pilots. The bands in the mid-90's who the labels forced on the public hoping to cash in on the grunge craze are not worth mentioning, completely laughable. Best piece I read so far was the Charles Cross one. He was the photographer who shot all those iconic, frenetic, slightly blurred, b&w Sub Pop album covers and photos. "It Began At The Ditto Tavern: Chris Cornell's Life As Grunge's True Seattle Son" All those bands I felt a kinship with right away, as if they were my peers, comrades, mentors, brothers in arms. They were suburban kids too, who had grown up playing in their garages, and turned their love of the Beatles, Led Zeppelin, Aerosmith, Black Sabbath and punk rock into something special and powerful. Thanks again for writing up your story. Brought back some great memories.

—

This shit is bananas.