Liv Hnilicka is a Minneapolis waitress. She shared a story on Facebook on Sunday that has gone viral.

This afternoon I was at my waitressing job on a beautiful early fall afternoon. Two parents and their young daughter came in; the tall burly dad adorably scratching his back on the door as they walked in. As I was filling the water station, he came up to me and said, "My daughter just asked if you were a boy or a girl. I didn't want to speak for you so would you like to talk to her?" I nervously said yes and walked to their table. "Hi, I like your hair ribbon," I said. "I heard you asked if I was a boy or girl. I think the important thing to remember is that everyone can be anything they want to be in this world. And it's also important to try to be the best selves we can be for our family and friends. And even to strangers. So to answer your question, I was told that I was a boy when I was little and now I live my adult life as a girl. It sounds complicated but it's actually pretty simple. Do you have any questions for me?" She looked at me smiling and simply said, "Nope!"

I walked away from the table feeling really good about parents intentionally engaging their children about possibly difficult topics. And showing that giving people the power to voice their truths in this complicated world is beautiful and healing.

Way to go, mom and dads out there making space for transfolks/gnc people like me. ❤

(Also I made this post public in case you want to share it with parents you may know.)

--Liv Hnilicka

Hnilicka says her eloquent response was not anything she'd rehearsed, but she has had enough negative interactions with families and children that she often thought about how she could one day have a conversation with a child that served as a teachable moment.

I also thought about myself as a child and the ways that I was or was not exposed to people I could identify with. Children are really just learning everything, so it's important to use those moments.

--Hnilicka

Just this morning I was waiting for the bus and this man walked by me and kept smiling at me and then finally said, 'Cut that faggoty shit out.' And I'm like, 'I'm just in the world; I'm just waiting for the bus. It doesn't have to be this big conflict.' So yeah, this interaction was so out of the ordinary that I felt like I needed to run to the mountain top and shout it to the world. Clearly it's resonated with people.

--Hnilicka

I do want to say in the wake of this viral post that I don't think it's a good idea to ask every person you interact with in your life to explain themselves but if you're wondering how someone identifies themselves to say, 'I use she/her pronouns (or whatever pronouns you prefer), what pronouns do you use?" It's a good benchmark of honoring someones identity.

--Hnilicka