Separation

I'm feeling that separation is the toxin that we have to overcome in order to find an antidote/vaccine, during this time of covid.

My wish is for each of us to find a solution that is mutually beneficial, as well as safe. Wherever volunteer help is needed and possible to be offered would be a good start, I think.

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mimi's picture

and separation of each other. I think we should not listen to it and stand up for each other, close by.

Love to you and yours. Hope everybody in your family is healthy and safe. Don't give up.

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Trauma is not what happens to you, but what happens inside you as a result of what happens to you. - Dr. Gabor Mate

janis b's picture

@mimi

Thank you for your enduring love and understanding.

I wish you and your family the fortitude to reach for the most.

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Unabashed Liberal's picture

your video later, because, believe it or not--at 1:30 am--we're getting ready for a late dinner. (long story--thankfully, this is a very rare occasion)

IOW, in no uncertain terms, Mr M is ready to eat--NOW! Biggrin

Anyhoo, just wanted to touch base, and let you know that I'm thinking of you. I know how difficult it is to lose a parent (having lost both of mine, although decades apart), and, hope that you're doing well. You've always come across as a super resilient person, which I feel will be to your advantage, thankfully.

Stay safe, and take good care of yourself. Pleasantry

Mollie

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Everyone thinks they have the best dog, and none of them are wrong.

janis b's picture

@Unabashed Liberal

for always bringing good tears with your love and warmth.

I think resilience is a shared commodity.

Enjoy your very late dinner.

xox

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Lookout's picture

...just not too many and keeping 6 ft apart is very safe IMO...especially during the day when the sun's UV can extinguish the virus.

No need to be totally isolated. I sure miss my music sessions though. Six feet isn't enough if there's singing - takes 25-30 ft... maybe more.

I hope the end is in sight... maybe by next spring or summer?

Keep a good heart and be well!

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“Until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

janis b's picture

@Lookout

I think these times have provided an opportunity fo us to creatively explore ways in which to satisfy our need for connection. I guess for now you have to sing solo. I hope it's sooner than later that you can once again enjoy singing together.

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enhydra lutris's picture

it or not, and we all have to find our own solutions. I like your proposed answer. We will be having a semi-separate dinner "party" with another couple this weekend. Separate tables in our patio, we provide appropriate wine(s), each couple orders pizza of their choice for take out and one of us plays "go fetch" whereupon we will discuss the inanities and insanities of the day. Sadly, both are devoted Bidenocrats and I will be hard pressed to steer the discussion into something meaningful, but I shall try all the same.

be well and have a good one

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That, in its essence, is fascism--ownership of government by an individual, by a group, or by any other controlling private power. -- Franklin D. Roosevelt --

janis b's picture

@enhydra lutris

I trust you've enjoyed nice pizza and wine in the company of friends. I'll bet that with your vast interests and knowledge you found something besides politics to discuss. I hope it was a nice break ; ).

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I went to bed early after being up early and having a busy day yesterday. I spotted your post on the way out the door.

Everybody's ability to work through is separation is different. All of us in my family is pretty self contained but living here it's hard to not be involved with others. The restrictions and protective measures have created physical distant but we found the exact opposite of separation. I'm more connected than before the virus hit.

A lot has to do with, as you suggest, helping others and asking for help when we needed it. We were restricted to one day a week driving between 6:00 and 2:00. Buses didn't operate and taxis were restricted to 3 days a week. Long lines in the few places that were open meant the normal 45 minute weekly grocery run ran 3-4 hours. Knowing who had what we needed was important and having others get stuff on their day to drive made a difference several times. Word of mouth and the neighbor WhatsApp group not only helped but brought people together. The number of delivery services, mostly motor bikes, exploded. They were one exemption to the driving restriction. It would be different in the city but we're on the outskirts in farm country. Neighbors would go out for a walk and we would talk through the fence, masked up, and spaced apart. The farmers worked fields and moved their cows around in the fields.

I seemed to spend more time talking to people by text, phone, or face-to-face than I usually did. Trying to put something together isn't ever easy here and the virus made it less so. Working with people brings us closer and builds trust in the relationship. I lived in the same house in the US for 22 years and I never came close to knowing any neighbor during that time like I do from living in this house the first week. Most of them feel like family to us now.

One of my little projects just began last week. My house cleaner works all day every Thursday. She is awesome. She speaks no English but that's perfect. She cleans anything that isn't moving too fast (The cats are grateful for that!) and goes full tilt boogie all day. She has three teens who started back to school Tuesday of last week. The choices are listen to classes on the radio, watch on TV, or use a computer via Zoom or MS Teams. They have neither a TV or computer. The web is accessible on their 2-3 generation old smartphones but that's inadequate. They walk the mile, uphill though unlike in my day it is only uphill one way but is steep, to use my laptop for afternoon classes. The two boys painted our house in August. (Boys hell! They did the job like men and better than any painters I've ever used. That's not common here. Painters usually have at least as much on themselves and their surroundings as the object.) These kids need every boost up to getting an education they can get.

These the kinds of help that brings people together whether they're separated or not. We really need to relearn how to be this way in the US.

Here are a couple of well written essays about the people of Cuenca:
Cuenca offers a bouquet of kindness
This one is more in tune with what you wrote. I think a lot of Cuencanos were really feeling the anxiety of separation. The wonderful traditional greeting of a hug and a peck near the cheek is dormant for now. I miss it and I haven't lived here my whole life. Public display of affection is a Cuenca tradition

I have the feeling that the writer of both of these would fit here quite well.

[Sorry, no time to edit. Too nice an afternoon.]

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"But I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now..."

janis b's picture

@vtcc73

It’s a pleasure to read about the experiences you share with the locals and other expats in Cuenca. There are few things that are more satisfying than mutually heartfelt exchanges with others. I’m happy for you. "It takes two to tango”. BTW, do they Tango in Equador?

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@janis b @janis b If so I would expect it on the coast where life moves faster like in most tropical areas. Cuenca is in the tropics but far from tropical except in the abundance of flora and fauna. The climate is high sierra except warmer than in temperare zones. The culture is less latino than a lot of Central and South America. It is heavily influenced by indigenous people and culture and leans more that direction. A good example is the "new" cathedral, Catedral de la Inmaculada Concepcion. Unlike the big cathedral in Quito there is not hundreds of kilos of gold (800 IIRC) although there is a little gold leaf and more gold paint. The stained glass windows have a representation of a European Jesus, an indigenous Jesus, and a black Jesus. I've never been all that fond of religion but knew this place, Cuenca, might have a much more acceptable culture when I heard the story from our guide. Even the music is heavily influenced by the Andean people. My builder's father loves Ecuadorian music and has tried to get us more interested. I've yet to hear anything you could tango to. You being the operative word. I don't have a dancing bone in my body. Wink

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"But I was so much older then, I'm younger than that now..."

janis b's picture

@vtcc73

for relating more about a culture and history that is unfamiliar, but interesting to me.

The cathedral you mentioned ...

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phones come in handy. Zoom meetings are also great for friends having a little night out together.
"Let me go to the store, post office, or bank, so you don't have to " is common.
Just sending emails that say I am thinking of you, wondering if you are ok, is a welcome gesture.

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janis b's picture

@on the cusp

Right, technology has been such a blessing during this time.

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janis b's picture

I'll be back later to respond..

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@janis b watching the video you posted last week with the stanford neuroscience guy. I left it in the q for a long time because it was so long (2:12), but finally got to it today. And...wow! Thank you so much for that. There were not a lot of words wasted in those 2+ hours and, though I don't *know* that it will ultimately help, more than one path forward is talked about and that's actually pretty cool. My hope and excitement for the future is somewhat restored. Thank you.

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janis b's picture

@peachcreek

It is a very inspirational exchange of ideas and practical knowledge. I'm really glad you watched it and enjoyed it as much as you did. Thank you for letting me know.

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