Stronger-Together Hillary-Rodham-Clinton's fast moving new book

Submitted by birdiemom87 on Thu, 09/15/2016 - 11:35pm

It's pretty difficult to find any levity in all things political these days, but read the reviews for HER new book Stronger-Together.

https://www.amazon.com/Stronger-Together-Hillary-Rodham-Clinton-ebook/dp...

This may move quickly into the "remainders" section, as it apparently is not moving too fast. I expect Jeff Bezos will be scrubbing these reviews shortly, so get 'em while you can! Several writers are a tad ticked to have to purchase the book to find out what her positions are (Trump's are free on his website). No word if the positions are actually in the book, or if they will only be found in future volumes.

Samples:

I was pretty disappointed with this book. When the subject of the book is one of greatest criminals in American history I was really hoping for more.
Anyone can be a criminal, but how do you become the GREATEST criminal? that is what readers really want to know.
A step-by-step guide on how to monetize political influence, how to flaunt criminal behavior and even daringly project ones own criminal behavior onto other people -- specifically other political opponents -- is what I, and I think I can speak for everyone, would really want from Hillary.
For example, How do I get the head of the FBI to conjure up non-existent legal standards for my law breaking? What kind of dirt do I need on the FBI for the head of the organization to lie under oath about the need for "intent" to mishandle classified information when an intent requirement is nowhere to be found for this law? Furthermore, how do I get the FBI director to look the other way from the obvious intent of setting up the server in the first place, telling staffers to remove classified headings, telling the company monitoring my server to use bleachbit to delete all the emails AFTER getting a subpoena? This is truly groundbreaking criminal excellence that needs to be explained and shared. Hillary claims to be about fairness so her keeping all these tips to herself isn't very "fair" to the rest of us aspiring criminals.
How about a step-by-step explanation for how I can project my illegal dealings with the Russians into a negative narrative for my political opponent? Hillary was able to sell 25% of an American strategic mineral (uranium) while coincidentally receiving a large donation to her foundation from people associated to the deal and the Russian company purchasing the large stake of US uranium, but that is not all! Hillary's husband went to Russia to give an AMAZING speech at a russian gov owned bank, I don't really know if it was amazing but I imagine it had to be for them to be willing to pay hundreds of thousands of dollars for a 45-90 min speech wink wink. Yet despite all this obviously nefarious and clearly dangerous for US Nat security behavior Hillary has successfully been able to shift her Russian ties onto her political opponent, another incredible feat!
How is it done?
How can we do it?

Or:

I was going to read this book.....I really was. But just as I got started, I found myself under sniper fire, passed out, and fell and hit my head. After that I got double vision and had to wear glasses that were so damn thick I couldn't even see to read. Then I was allergic to something and started coughing so hard I spit out what looked like a couple of lizard's eyeballs, my limbs locked up, and I passed out and fell down again, waking up only to find out I had pneumonia. It's a good thing I was able to make a small fortune making this random small trade in the commodities market (cattle futures or some such thing) and then, of all things, a few banks offered me a few million to to talk to their employees for a few minutes - and all that really helped out because I swear I was dead broke and couldn't figure out how I was gonna come up with the 6 bucks to pay for this book, let alone pay the $1,500 for my health insurance this month. I still want to read it, but, hell, what difference at this point does it make? I hear it sucks anyway.

And my personal favorite:

Soon after I finished the first chapter, I went back to reread a paragraph to make a confirmation and the entire first chapter was gone, Then I noticed more and more of the book was deleting itself.By the time I had given up, there was nothing left but blank pages.

Tags:

Writer's cramp

Vote

Comments

Submitted by Not Henry Kissinger on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 12:01am

These are hysterical!

I was looking for a good crime/conspiracy/narcissistic/compulsive lying/corrupt/crooked/assassination/pay-for-play bathroom read. And boy did this hit the nail right on Seth Rich's head. From the moment I first opened the book it felt like a warm wet fart right in my face, and I was hooked immediately. I was reluctant thinking it would all be about weddings and yoga, but boy was I wrong. I even turned down a night out on the town with my boy Bill dicking bimbos. To stay home and read. This one is one of those you just can't put down fast enough.

Wouldn't you rather save your money up to be the ambassador to Fiji?

I found a copy of this book laying on a table in the local Starbucks. I should have known from the smeared icing on the cover that it was not an instant classic. I sat down at the table with my mocha venti and start reading. I haven't read a book this bad since "30-Minute Meals" by Jeffrey Dahmer. Hillary can add this book to her ever-growing list of crimes. First off, this book should be in the science-fiction section. Just the same empty rhetoric we always hear from these lying politicians. This book definitely will not help her in the polls. Look for the Hillary/Huma sex tape coming soon as a last-ditch effort to win the election.

The Kindle version of this book gave me pneumonia, deleted all of my emails, and caused my phone to self destruct.

Save your money for food for your family just in case she is elected.

Thanks for the tip!

—

The current working assumption appears to be that our Shroedinger's Cat system is still alive. But what if we all suspect it's not, and the real problem is we just can't bring ourselves to open the box?

Submitted by MsGrin on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 12:48am

My fav

What a horrible book. I got brain damage after 4 pages and lost my shoe

—

'What we are left with is an agency mandated to ensure transparency and disclosure that is actually working to keep the public in the dark' - Ann M. Ravel, former FEC member

Submitted by birdiemom87 on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 12:14am

Yup, good isn't it?

Laughs are few and far between when it comes to this election. She should hire some of these writers, they are SO much a cut above her CRT trolls.

Submitted by Not Henry Kissinger on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 12:20am

84% are 1 Star

Stuff like this makes me think the polls showing her at 40% are complete bs.

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Submitted by Older and Wiser Now on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 12:44am

Don't take the Five Star ones for granted, my friend

or else you might miss gems like this

This is a great book. The chapters on "How to screw up everything you touch with hubris" "How to write the perfect doctor's note" and "D**ing bimbos at home" were worth the price of admission.

or this one

Only a Clinton would charge the American people to read her plans for the country should she be elected.

I'd write a bad review but I don't want to die in a car crash or commit suicide by shooting myself in the head twice

—

~OaWN

Submitted by Thaumlord-Exelbirth on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 10:52am

Don't the polls exclude

Like, every single person bellow the age of 40 or something?

Submitted by Not Henry Kissinger on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 11:47am

CNN excludes everyone below 35.

A Johnson supporter does a nice breakdown here.

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Submitted by ThoughtfulVoter on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 2:29pm

Change the debate rules.

I think one of the first things that the Bernie groups needs to do is to change the system of who decides which candidates can debate on national TV. The current system is so anti-democratic that I am amazed no one has already changed it.

Wouldn't something like so many voter signatures be a more representative threshold? It doesn't cost much more to have 4 podiums rather than 2, so what's the big deal here?

Submitted by Older and Wiser Now on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 12:31am

Don't forget the comments made IN REPLY to those comments!

For example, I love what some clever soul had to say about the first comment that you quoted, birdiemom. In other words, in reply to this

... Anyone can be a criminal, but how do you become the GREATEST criminal? that is what readers really want to know.
A step-by-step guide on how to monetize political influence, how to flaunt criminal behavior and even daringly project ones own criminal behavior onto other people -- specifically other political opponents -- is what I, and I think I can speak for everyone, would really want from Hillary ...

I found this

Let me just cut to the chase: is this reviewer single? Where do I apply?

—

~OaWN

Submitted by Alligator Ed on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 12:47am

I could but be astonished at the deadly irony on the Amazon

page where it lists other Clintonian masterpieces such as "Hillary Clinton on Women"

Submitted by Centaurea on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 2:02am

An unfortunate title

"Stronger Together" -- in retrospect, a rather unfortunately titled book, given the events of this past Sunday.

—

"Don't go back to sleep ... Don't go back to sleep ... Don't go back to sleep."
~Rumi

"If you want revolution, be it."
~Caitlin Johnstone

Submitted by Writerinres on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 7:15am

Thank you, Birdiemom!

Funniest Friday morning, ever, since this whole, horrible nightmare of an election got underway. The reviewers should be signed up for auditions on SNL, pronto. Forget the skewed polls; these reviews are the true barometer of how Clinton will fare on November 8th, unless we're attacked by Russian missiles on November 7th and vote Hill in because we're scared that Putin and The Donald are too cosy together and claiming world domination via WWIII.

Submitted by birdiemom87 on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 8:57pm

You are welcome,

Laughs are few and very far between, especially when they appear on the same page as the royalty. Glad I could provide some fun... I think I may have a look around the reviews on some of her other books, in case the Amazon reviewers are updating those, too.

Submitted by GreatLakeSailor on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 12:19pm

My fave is a positive review by "DB"

What a fantastic book! I see that Amazon has this for under $20, but I paid slightly more. I bought this directly from the Clinton foundation for $3.5 million. Once I read this book it's like everything in my life clicked. The state department released funds from an "associate" of mine who for some odd reason was mistakenly put on the terrorist watchlist. He then invested in my "housing development" project in Saudi Arabia. Also 14 of my relatives were able to get permanant resident status and my niece got a job at a US Embassy! I suppose I could've saved some money by buying the version from Amazon, but by buying directly from the Clinton foundation I got a special edition that is much thicker and has pages hollowed out for future "uses". I hope this book has an audio version because I would love to pay for play...ing it.

—

Compensated Spokes Model for Big Poor.

Submitted by birdiemom87 on Fri, 09/16/2016 - 8:48pm

Oh wow, that is really good!

When I saw these, I was at first amused, and with each one, the entire thing became ever more irreverent, so much fun! I would be quite surprised if they were not soon scrubbed, not nice for the queen to have to avert her shifty eyes........ But in the meantime, tee hee :~)