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SNIPPET FROM FAUX SNOOZE ARTICLE:
Document reportedly shows Marine vet running for office was AWOL

A former Marine running for state office in Pennsylvania was declared a deserter, despite touting his service throughout his campaign, according to a federal military document.

The document, obtained by The Scranton Times-Tribune, shows that former state Rep. Kevin Haggerty was absent without leave for two months from the Marines and ruled a deserter.