Be my therapists - on and off I get the advice to seek one -
and 'get some help'. I still haven't figured out with what I need help with, but open-minded as I am, (ahem), here I go. (Anyhow, I would say at 71 years of age I am a tough case with regards to therapy)
Ok, here my quiz question for your personal qualification as my future therapist:
1. You are a granddaddy now. Let's say your own melanine level has been determined by your European/Russian anchestry. You love your daughters, whose melanin level is round about the same shade of white than your own.
2. But one of darling daughters happened to make a baby with someone, who has the melanine level that is 'real brown leaning to the black side'.
3. And the other darling daughter happened to make a baby with someone, who has the melenine level, which is not 'the real brown' leaning to the black side, yet still more brown-ish than your own.
4. You are left with two grandkids, both are slightly off the melanine level of yourself, the one grandkid a lot more off than the other grandkid.
5. The father of the not so brown, but still not white enough grandkid, felt a pity with the real brown father of the more brown grandkid, and offered himeself as a 'mediator' between you - the white/European/Russian grandfather - and the too brown father of the too brownish grandkid.
6. The father of the too brownish grandkid, rejected that mediatior role of the less brown father of the not white enough, but still not too brown enough, other grandkid.
7. The grandfather advised the daughter, who made the brownish grandkid, to better go to the United States and live there, as there are "more brown people over there than in Europe". The kiddo would fit in there better than here (in Germany), the grandfather elaborated.
So, who was more of a racist and who was less of a racist in this scenario?
a. The grandfather for his adivce to one of his daughters to go the US with her too brown a kid?
b. the real brown father of the darker brownish grandkid for rejecting the 'mediator' role, being too anti-white?
c. or the less brown father with the less brownish - but still not white enough - grandkid - to take advantage of being in between the real white and the real black side?
d. finally - heaven forbid - me for posting the question in this diary?
How could I be that racially challenged, you think? (I ask that myself as well.)
My son thinks I should go hiking in some beautiful nature and forget about it. Not worth thinking it through. What a lazy-butt-kiddo I have when it comes to thinking.
I love him at least as much as my father loved me though.
(Sigh, I didn't get my Turkey and am not drunk with Vodka, but sober like a white dove of peace.)
I learned to cook from my mother-in-law, spicy African dishes that is. All the spice is gone, like all of them are gone.
I miss them so.