Meta Monkeyshines: The FAQs and only the FAQs

Several days ago the c99p Monkey Team was assembled (see photo below), with apologies, please ignore that the Team are actually apes, but that is another tail, err tailess, err tale. With an important commission in mind, the Team and myself were locked in a undisclosed location for three days, a store of libation including a 50 gallon drum of coffee for the Team leader and several drums of banana smoothies for the coalition of the willing, willing that is, as long as the smoothies flowed freely.

MonkeyTeam.png
More meta monkeyshines below the fold...

Each Team member was granted a computer along with a keyboard featuring extra large keys to accommodate oversize primate digits. Meditation was practiced to clear the minds, calisthenics to prepare the body, and diapers to thwart the simian proclivity for flinging dookie projectiles.

With a "Let's rock!" decree from the Team leader, all hell was let loose unto a soup of alphanumeric syllabary. Arms raised, fingers curled in anticipation and in a cacophony of crunching stressed keys, the Infinite Monkey Theorem was put to the test. Fur flew, keys groaned, fingernails broke, language was mangled, monitors shed tears, and barrels of libations were emptied.

As per the Theorem, the Team lacked infinite time to complete the task that it was set upon, but lack of eternity was made up for with tenacity, devotion, and a threat of resurrecting the Gipper for a remake of Bedtime for Bonzo if the deadline wasn't met, that sent a shudder through the Team. And despite a lack of coherent grammatical skills, and regardless of the constraints of intellect, the missive was met, albeit garbled and discombobulated. But due to the diligence of the copy editor the day, or shall I say three days, was saved. The copy editor is the one lying prone on the floor in the lower left hand corner of the team photo. We're still not sure if he passed out from data overload or if he spiked his banana smoothies.

Although this amazing Team failed to write anything close to a work by Shakespeare, there did emerge several additions to the c99p FAQs (Frequently Asked Questions).

The FAQs can be accessed by hovering over the "Navigation" button in the header menu and then select "FAQs". I'll also add a link in the "Site Menu" in the sidebar. I realize the new FAQs have been sorely needed for a long time but due to the amount of work put into them, a lack of time, and the difficulty of assembling a competent team we were just now able to get to them. Actually there was a list of FAQs before this effort, twice in fact, the first set had to be deleted because of a major change in the architecture of the site and they were no longer pertinent, and the other time all of the FAQs were lost in a major software update.

The list of FAQs are not yet complete with more to come, but what is there now should meet most of the needs of the members. I hope they are of some use.

Thanks folks.

Disclaimer: No animals were harmed in the telling of this tail, err, tailess, err tale.

Tags: 
Share
up
25 users have voted.

Comments

If you find any misspellings or grammatical errors in the FAQs they will be summarily blamed on the unconscious copy editor.

If you see any mistakes or if you have any ideas for additional FAQs let me know. I am currently working on a few more FAQs including Frequently Used HTML and a thorough explanation of the parent comment links, among others. I'll, opps I mean we (the Team) will make the FAQs as comprehensive as time will allow.

Now, when folks have problems with the site you should be able to just point them to the FAQs rather than explaining.

I hope they help.

up
15 users have voted.
Bisbonian's picture

@JtC
Just remember, there are no eyes in "team".

up
9 users have voted.

"I’m a human being, first and foremost, and as such I’m for whoever and whatever benefits humanity as a whole.” —Malcolm X

@Bisbonian
we all think alike.

up
9 users have voted.
divineorder's picture

@Bisbonian

up
5 users have voted.

A truth of the nuclear age/climate change: we can no longer have endless war and survive on this planet. Oh sh*t.

With a scoop of ice cream on the side.

JtC, I wish you had time to write more funny stuff.

I've been having a very pleasant Sunday and your enjoyable OP added to it.

Thank you for the FAQ.

up
11 users have voted.

@HenryAWallace
you got some cheer out of it. And you're welcome.

up
7 users have voted.
divineorder's picture

@JtC

up
5 users have voted.

A truth of the nuclear age/climate change: we can no longer have endless war and survive on this planet. Oh sh*t.

Lookout's picture

Was a monkey wrench required?

monkey wrench.jpg

up
12 users have voted.

“Until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

@Lookout
a team of mechanics actually. They opened the libation barrels and maintained the computers and made sure the Team leader didn't fall asleep.

They were dubbed The Monkey Wrench Gang. The Gang leader did a lot of shade tree mechanic work on the side. I'm pretty sure that's him in your photo. Whoever's bike he's working on is taking a big risk, he isn't wearing a diaper!

up
9 users have voted.
Lookout's picture

@JtC

but somebody has to do it.

Thanks!

up
8 users have voted.

“Until justice rolls down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream.”

1. Why won't my iphone stay signed in? Do I really have to sign in for each diary?

2 The image loader is slow for me. Can they program it to delete uploaded photos every 60 days or so?

Thank them for all of the hard work. Order them a banana smoothie on me.

up
3 users have voted.

"Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich."--Napoleon

@dkmich
and here's what we came up with:

1 - That sounds like a cookie issue, or a bookmark issue. If you use a bookmark to access the site delete it, navigate to the site and create a new one and see if that helps.

2 - I'd love to delete uploaded photos every 60 days or so but unfortunately that would wipe out the imagery from past essays and possibly current essays if the images were reused.

I'll look into the uploader thing.

The Team says; "You're welcome". I also just found out that they've unionized. Besides banana smoothies, they are now demanding a Netflix account for each and every one of them. Something about wanting to watch old Tarzan movies or some such. Damn commies!

up
5 users have voted.