Glamping : A & B's Excellent Adventure
Boy, did we ever learn a lot! Mostly the hard way!
The goal was to find a secluded cabin for 2 with WiFi, cell phone, a view of Lake Sam Rayburn,and some hiking trails.
Well, Yahoo driving directions, once the perfect link, doesn't seem to exist anymore. Everything directed us to Google. Google does not show or mention CR (country roads) or FM (farm to market roads)at all. It added 1 hour and a 1/4 tank of spent fuel to the initial first day of vacation.
We finally found the cabin, and the owner/mgr was on her golf cart nearby, helped us get the door unlocked, answered general inquiries about store and hiking trail locations.
OK. After packing, driving an extra hour while lost, we were told that, unlike what the website said about hiking trails and lake views, what it REALLY meant was that the water view was easy walking distance if you wanted to walk a couple of miles. And the fabulous hiking trails were also a mile or more away,except they were in a state park that closed all hiking trails. To make matters worse, all roads for scenic driving in the park were closed.
All that was open in the state park the public boat ramp. We parked, took a look, returned to the cabin.
Hokay. B imagined us watching movies, listening to cool music, but forgot his remote, so that didn't happen.
A almost froze to death on the first night. It wasn't until the morning we figured out the A/C was also a heater. We didn't need it on the second night.
Cooking was "interesting". I recommend a pizza maker called the Presto "Pizazz". We used it to make toast. We used the microwave for cooking bacon.
And then, day 2, no trails, no scenery, B got the idea to head to a real Texas honkytonk, drink a couple of beers in the outdoor bar, listen to some Cajun music, or whatever was played. * A is the beer drinker who NEVER goes to a bar, since A must go 3 rivers down to avoid clients or adverse parties who are pissed off.
Google let us down again.
The bar 10 miles away was closed. Another Google search (are we masochistic?) said "The Happy Cajun Bar" was close by and fun. Except we went back and forth, asked locals to tell us where it was located, finally found it.
To our horror, it had no open outdoor bar, but all staff wore masks, tables were sanitized when people entered and left, and it was big.
We stayed in a remotely placed table, and enjoyed the scene of 3 or 4 people having fun at the bar.
And then,the karaoke DJ arrived. A heavyset woman in her 60's, wearing a hat covered with blue sequins. She talked smack, played tunes, and then the singers started arriving. As a announced, Jessica, Bill, Gary, John, Kate, Gail, "Nay Nay", Mark, the DJ, in rotation. Over and over. We were fascinated by Buck singing a song 1 measure behind the song. But lots of other singers did the same. It was just a thing. Gail sang a Linda Ronstadt song one octave below, note for note. Well, most of the other songs she sang were an octave lower. We were fascinated by John, who sang Neil Diamond, and asked me for suggestions. I tried to suggest the easiest ones to sing I could dredge up in my mind. He dedicated them to us. (We felt we were channeling Diamond. Not.)
Wilma brought us German chocolate cake, as Mark and Gail were having their birthday on the same day.
Some guy came in the bar. But for weight and longish hair, I swore I knew him. I was 110 miles from home. **I did. My client/friend Tom. He bought us a beer, talked about his daughter's legal issues. I represent her. 2 rivers, not 3 rivers down. I must be more vigilant.
Jesse sang a John Prine song. Asked us if we liked it. Seems B is a Prine aficionado. Jesse sat at our huge table, talked Prine, shook her empty beer bottle and B bought her a beer. I went to the ladies' room, Jesse moved much closer to B.
As time wore on, we were begged to sing, we endured good music pretty much ruined by singing so bad it defies description. We talked about our ears bleeding, our eyes bulging, ensuing nightmares, and we laughed and laughed, and clapped, and got thumbs up from the singers. They screamed for us to come back, as they are all there, every Saturday night, and we are welcome.
A highlight was "Tequila". Buck played a balloon shaped sax, Mark danced with the mike in his hand, and at appropriate times, the room sang, "Tequila!"
At least twice, during breaks, the DJ played some hip hop, and the singers became "dancers". We will always remember 70 year olds twerking.
Ok, neither A nor B have gone to a bar anywhere on earth and stayed there, having a screaming laugh a minute for 7 solid hours, until we did on Day 2 of our failed nature getaway at a remote lake cabin with a failed view...failed damn access!...to a giant lake and state park. Neither A nor B have been in a bar at all in ages!
When we returned to the cabin, it was way too late to grill the steaks. We were starving. So, in a pinch, here is what we did, and what will work for all of you in a pinch:
Microwave Baked Potato
Scrub a potato. Place it on a plate or paper towel in a microwave. Cook 5 minutes. When the timer signals, flip the spud, cook another 5 minutes.
Then, slice it down the middle, load it with whatever you like, such as butter, cheese, sour cream, etc... then eat it while laughing about what you just did that you never, ever, did before, but really, REALLY, hope you do again.
It was a couples cooking thing where A scrubbed and turned on the microwave, did the flipping, but B stuffed them.
We got home, booked a trip for Thanksgiving at a cabin on Toledo Bend.
We intend to laugh our way through the next unexpected trip problem, and we will have potatoes and microwave ovens ready.