Lord Voldemort says Harry Potter wants to kill and enslave muggles
Presidential candidate Lord Voldemort has revealed in a shocking Daily Prophet exclusive that Harry Potter plans to kill and enslave muggles should he defeat Voldemort in November's election. Lord Voldemort goes on to accuse Potter that he is a Deep State operative who works with the Ministry of Magic and is a disciple of pedophile, groomer Dumbledore.
Potter has responded that Voldemort and his paramilitary Death Eaters are racists, obsessed with magical blood purity, and has been convicted of 34 counts of fraud. Voldamort easily brushed these accusations aside as "fake news", that Potter is the real racist, and that he's done more for muggle rights than anyone in history.
"Harry Potter is a very bad man," said Voldemort. "His mudblood aunt and uncle have told me that he was a very bad and disrespectful child, despite them giving him a room under the stairs. Many people say that Harry Potter is responsible for his parent's dying."
The Daily Prophet can confirm that Potter has been criminally responsible for breaking into Gringott's Bank, assisting escaped convict Sirius Black, and is a far-left socialist. Potter has failed to clarify his positions on the treatment of magical creature and has been accused of being soft on crime, while Voldemort has had a much more clear stance on the death penalty and immigration.
"If you want a strong leader who will make Hogwarts great again, then vote He Who Cannot Be Named in November," the Voldemort's spokesman said. "Otherwise there will likely be violence and civil war."
Comments
The general strategy in 2024,
for both parties, is to point and say "look! Shiny object!" while a genocide is occurring.
As for the Democrats, He Who Cannot Be Named is actually in power in the White House! Literally! Right now! We know it's not Kamala, and are pretty sure it's not Joe. Maybe it's Antony Blinken? So who is it? The specific individual, apparently, can't be named. I suspect that He Who Cannot Be Named will not be letting go of the reins of power regardless of who wins in November.
NB: it's spelled "Voldemort," with an E. Not that it's important or anything -- I am not a fan of either Rowling or her books.
On a related topic, what did you think of the Due Dissidence critique of Star Wars, that the whole universe was doomed with the invention of "midichlorians"?
My own theory is that Star Wars died in May of 2020 with the last episode of the "Clone Wars" animated series, though its impending death was evident in "The Force Awakens." Just because Lucas invented "midichlorians" doesn't mean subsequent authors had to use them.
“The loyal Left cannot act decisively. Their devotion to the system is a built-in kill switch limiting dissent.” - Richard Moser
I have to agree with Due Dissidence
It was only a matter of time until a Mary Sue was invented.
With Disney? Sure.
My point was that there was no necessary bad end, there, with "The Phantom Menace," and, had Disney been a bit more discerning in their approval of scripts, they might still be cranking out Star Wars stuff with actual ideas. Instead, you have:
1) a poorly thought-through notion of what was to happen after "Return of the Jedi," thus three crap sequel movies
2) lots of fan service ("let's bring back Billy Dee Williams and Ian McDiarmid because they're fun to watch, not because we have anything meaningful for them to do").
3) elaborate footnotes on what came before (e.g. "The Book of Boba Fett," "Star Wars: Obi-Wan Kenobi," "Solo," "Rogue One," "The Bad Batch," and "Andor").
4) derivative space Western ("The Mandalorian").
So I would argue the last actual ideas that they had were put into "The Clone Wars." Here one recalls that J.R.R. Tolkien tried, briefly, to write a sequel to "Lord of the Rings." He quit after 13 pages. Disney, otoh, does not know when to quit. I'm hoping for Disney's bankruptcy, followed by fire sale.
“The loyal Left cannot act decisively. Their devotion to the system is a built-in kill switch limiting dissent.” - Richard Moser
Star Wars
died with Jar Jar Binks. Everything after that was completely uninteresting. I like my space opera straight, no chaser.
Twice bitten, permanently shy.
That's pretty funny.
I will say, however, that one can usually tell that an artist is "tapped out" not when they put out occasional garbage like Jar Jar Binks, but when everything they do is either garbage or irrelevant. It's at that point that you can say that the full story has been told and that said author is just milking the old stories' settings for cash.
“The loyal Left cannot act decisively. Their devotion to the system is a built-in kill switch limiting dissent.” - Richard Moser
Unrelated
How pro-Palestinian is Kamala? (according to Trump)
At a recent rally in North Carolina, former President Donald Trump, Harris’ opponent in the presidential race, claimed Harris is “running away from Israel.” Trump also criticized Harris for not attending Netanyahu’s speech before Congress.
“Even if you’re against Israel or you’re against the Jewish people, show up and listen to the concept,” Trump said. “But she’s totally against the Jewish people.”
In an interview on Fox Business News on July 25, Republican Sen. Rick Scott bluntly claimed that Harris “supports Hamas” and “works for the Hamas-loving part of her party.”
In an interview with CNN on the same day, Nikki Haley, the former U.S. ambassador to the United Nations who ran for the Republican presidential nomination this year, said Harris has “always sided with the Palestinian protests instead of our friend Israel.”
Scott also criticized Harris for failing to show up for Netanyahu’s address to a joint session of Congress on July 24 and claimed that Harris did not “[call] out these protesters that defaced … Union Station.”
On CNN’s “State of the Union” on July 28, Republican Sen. Tom Cotton claimed that in her statement, Harris “equivocated between Hamas and Israel and effectively blamed Israel for civilian casualties in Gaza or for the lack of food in Gaza that Hamas is diverting from aid stations.”
In a radio interview after Harris’ meeting with Netanyahu, Trump said it was clear, “No. 1, she doesn’t like Israel. No. 2, she doesn’t like Jewish people. You know it, I know it, everybody knows it and nobody wants to say it.”
In December, Politico reported that Harris had been pushing the Biden administration “to show more concern publicly for the humanitarian damage in Gaza” and for Biden specifically to “show more sensitivity to Palestinian civilians.” The story, citing an unnamed person close to the vice president’s office, said Harris advocated for the U.S. taking a tougher posture with Netanyahu in pushing for a peace deal.
Former president Donald Trump promised to crush pro-Palestinian protests on college campuses, telling a roomful of donors — a group that he joked included “98 percent of my Jewish friends” — that he would expel student demonstrators from the United States, according to participants in the roundtable event with him in New York.
“One thing I do is, any student that protests, I throw them out of the country. You know, there are a lot of foreign students. As soon as they hear that, they’re going to behave,” Trump said on May 14, according to donors at the event.
A beaming Trump was waiting for Netanyahu on the stone steps outside his private club and residence in Palm Beach, Florida. He warmly clasped the hands of the Israeli leader. “We’ve always had a great relationship,” Trump insisted before journalists.
Republican Donald Trump has called US President Joe Biden “a very bad Palestinian” who doesn’t want to help Israel “finish the job” against Hamas in its war on Gaza.
“He doesn’t want to do it. He’s become like a Palestinian – but they don’t like him because he’s a very bad Palestinian, he’s a weak one,” former president Trump said in the first presidential debate with Biden on Thursday in Atlanta, Georgia.